Fate's Favourite Toy
by Retse
Summary: Life's unpredictable when you're the FFT. So Harry shouldn't really be surprised when Fate picks his choice of vacation destination for him: a world where Nev's the BoyWhoLived, Voldie's alive, his counterpart's a bully and Harry's eleven slash warning
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

A.N.: A new story... It just wouldn't go away and let me work on the others in peace -.- sigh btw will be slash - i have already decided on the pairing

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**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Prologue.**

Harry stared at the omnipotent being known as Fate incredulously and wondered vaguely if he was having an alcohol-induced nightmare. It certainly seemed like the case what with fuzzy memories of having a drinking a contest with Ron at the forefront of his mind supporting this theory. So Harry did the most logical thing one would do when they found themselves in a situation such as this – he pinched himself. Hard.

"Ouch!"

Harry scowled. Not only did this fail in waking him and make his arm sore, it also got him an amused snort from the aforementioned immortal. Unacceptable. Especially when one is more inclined to chopping the other into a million pieces than becoming a source of entertainment.

"So let me get this straight," Harry went back to being incredulous when his glowering failed to get him any answers, "You've been watching me from some crystal ball for all my life, including whenever I had a bath," Fate did his/her/its best to look innocent at this, "which is disturbingly stalkeresque might I add, and, having heard that I'll be going on a vacation, have taken it upon yourself to pick the destination for me."

Fate nodded happily and made to comment but Harry gestured for him/her/it to stay silent as he hadn't finished talking yet, "Furthermore, deciding that no country… no world… this **whole dimension** apparently not worth my time, instead you're going to send me, against my will no less, to **another** dimension where everything is practically the same anyway."

Fate nodded proudly, seemingly thinking that the green-eyed Gryffindor was very happy with his idea and was about to commend him/her/it on his/her/its brilliance.

Harry just continued speaking, looking at the immortal weirdly while frantically tried to think of a way to get himself out of this but how the heck do you get away from **Fate**? Heaven knows he's tried before… "Except for a few differences. One being that **Neville** is the Boy-Who-Lived."

Fate nodded happily again.

"And my counterpart, who, according to you, is a spoilt brat, and **his** parents along with a whole bunch of people who have died are still alive."

Happy nod.

"Of which includes **Voldemort**."

Fate appeared to be a bit less certain about this but nodded with as much vigour as he had before.

"Who had somehow gotten his body back in Neville's second year but has been laying low ever since for a reason that you're not going to tell me just… because."

Fate ignored Harry's exasperated look and nodded again.

"And not to mention I don't have a choice in this…"

Fate nodded smugly. Harry refrained from smashing the others face in.

"And you're going to send me to the beginning of my fourth year except I'm going to be a **first year** because you weren't bothered to set me up with international school transfer back story."

Fate nodded sheepishly this time.

"And did I mention I don't have a choice in this?"

Fate's grin answered this question loud and clear – Yes, he did and no, he didn't.

"With a name of Harry **SKYWALKER** of all names! I can't believe you've actually watch Star Wars… Merlin, I'm surprised you have actually have a DVD player! But I suppose I should feel lucky that you hadn't decided Baggins instead because you think it's 'witty'. And NO! We're not going to change it back to that because you're having seconds thoughts!"

Fate pouted.

"And I don't get a choice at all."

"Nope!" Fate finally spoke up and then waved in farewell to Harry with a mischievous grin on his face.

"And-" -ZAP-

Harry paused as he glanced warily at his new surroundings, in particular, the lack of Omnipotent-Beings-Who-Liked-To-Mess-With-Both-Harry's-Mind-And-Life. Catching sight of a mirror and his 11 year old reflection staring back at him, the once Harry James Potter now Harry 'Fate's Favourite Toy' Skywalker could only think of one thing to say…

"Fuck!!!"

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As usual, review and tell me what you think :) 


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

A.N.: omg, I updated o.o kinda short though... sorry peeps :3

Warnings: Slash (though not yet) and warnings of the usual unbetadness :P

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**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 1.**

Harry barely contained his irritated twitching as he glared at the wall opposite him. He couldn't stop his teeth grinding though but can you really blame him? He'd been sent into another dimension, **against his will**, as a first year during what should have been his **fourth** year. Not only that but **Voldemort** had already bloody gotten his body back though he supposed he should be grateful he wasn't the Boy-Who-Lived anymore – not, instead the Harry here was a spoiled brat (the lucky b-tard) – but that wasn't the worst of it! The absolutely worst thing was...

He was short again.

Those precious inches he had gotten over the last few years... gone! **Sob.** All because of a meddlesome immortal being hell-bent on turning his life into a soap opera all for his own amusement. It went without saying that he'd be shorter than Ron but to be shorter than Hermione **and **most likely, Ginny... Life never sucked as much as it did now – which was quite the achievement considering.

Harry took in a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. However, he could **feel** Fate watching him – **laughing **at him – and that certainly wasn't helping him any. So he sat there, seething, as resignation slowly but steadily crept up on him. So wrapped up in his emotions that he didn't notice the door opening.

"What's **your** problem?" a voice sneered.

Harry barely contained his jump in surprise as he spun round to stare at the perpetrator. He couldn't keep his eyes from widening enormously though. And the multitude of ways a certain immortal was going to die running through his head.

Oh my God... he thought disbelievingly, It's... **me**.

Harry's reflection raised an eyebrow, **towering** over him (though in his defense, he was sitting while the other was standing), "Are you mentally retarded or what?"

Harry, who shall now be known as Short Harry or Sharry to prevent confusion ("I'm not short, damn it!" Sharry argued loudly. Fate just hummed, totally uninterested, "I think we need to change your first name too. Any witty ideas anyone? Those who suggest James or Evan **will** die a horrid and lonely death."), scowled but ignored him. The last thing he needed was to get caught up in a fight with **himself** of all people.

Fourth year Harry, who shall now be known as Shithead to prevent confusion (Sharry raised an eyebrow at Fate. Fate stared back, shrugging after a moment, "I don't like him," he simply remarked. Sharry rolled his eyes, "At this point I'm inclined to agree with you but we're trying to write a semi-serious fanfic here and 'Shithead' is **not** the way to go." Here, more staring ensued. Finally, Fate scowled, "Fine, we'll call him Big Harry, or in other words, Barry." Sharry nodded, satisfied, ignoring the stab at his height again.), frowned, not used to being ignored, especially by some insignificant little twit, "Get out," he finally said.

Sharry blinked up at Barry in confusion ("Oh, come on," Sharry whined, "There's got to be a better choice for names... Look, even the author grimaces whenever she writes that!" he said, pointing Retse who is indeed grimacing, "This wasn't how this chapter was supposed to go..." she grumbles as she types.), "What?" he said, not understanding the others meaning.

Barry sneered, "I'm a fourth year and so I have priority. Go and find another compartment. We don't need you here sticking your nose into our business."

It was then Sharry noticed the other three behind Barry, shadowing him like Malfoy's apes er... that is, Crabbe and Goyle once did. _Seamus and Dean_, he thought, recognising the two teens immediately. However, the last teen he didn't recognise. He had black hair and blue eyes and was as tall as the Ron from his world, not to mention taller than Barry.

And strangely, he felt as if he had met the older boy before...

In any case, all three looked down on him with expressions mirroring Barry's – who was obviously the ringleader of this bunch. Sharry couldn't stop him teeth from grinding again as he glared back at them, stubbornly refusing to budge. He tensed as Barry reached forward to grab him...

...only to be stopped midway by another voice, "Potter!" the voice screamed, "What do you think you're doing!"

"Granger," Barry growled, "Mind your own business, Bucktooth."

Hermione Granger coloured angrily, "You're not allowed to force a First Year to leave his compartment just because you're older than him. If you can't find an empty one, you'll just have to share!" The three teens glared at her, not moving, "I'll go find a prefect!" she threatened, voice rising slightly.

"Whatever," Barry scowled, "Let's go," he waved nonchalantly at the other three boys as he turned and left, leaving them to scurry after him. Sharry, who will now be known as Harry again as that name is starting to disturb the author very much so, furrowed his eyebrows. Fate had said that Neville was the Boy-Who-Lived... then why were the three boys treating **Harry** as a God?

Hermione sighed in relief before turning to give him a reassuring smile which Harry returned though he supposed it may have come out more as a grimace. As much as he wanted to get to know her again... She opened her mouth to ask what was wrong only to be interrupted by a frantic voice.

"Hermione! Are you alright?" a tall, gangly red-head Harry knew very well bustled inside, "We heard your voice and then saw **them** come out," his voice filled with venom. _Ron_, Harry thought, the urge to reach out and hug the both of them growing.

Hermione shook her head and smiled, "I'm fine. Thankfully, they didn't try anything this time."

"Bloody bastards," Ron Weasley muttered darkly. _Can things get any weirder..._ Harry mused to himself.

"What were they doing?" another male voice cut in. Harry glanced at the tall brunette that had come in after Ron. He looked very familiar but for some reason he just couldn't place a name. He was both similar yet vastly different to whoever he reminded Harry of.

Hermione sighed again, "Trying to force a first year to leave so they could have this compartment, Neville."

It took every fibre in Harry's small frame to stop his jaw dropping in astonishment. _This was Neville? __**Neville!**_ He couldn't help but think in disbelief. The Neville **he** remembered in his 4th year was a shy, round-faced and slightly pudgy brunette who didn't get a growth spurt and a **backbone** until his 6th year. **This** Neville was slim and slightly muscled and towered over him, practically **exuding** a confidence he had only seen in his Neville on the battlefield! Golden-brown hair cut in a way not to dissimilar to the Neville Harry knew, though this Neville had thought to let his fringe grow longer, covering most of his forehead and part of his right eye, no doubt in an attempt to cover his scar like Harry once did. Soft brown eyes gazed at him curiously as he settled himself into the seat opposite Harry, setting Trevor the toad carefully on the small table.

_I guess some things never change_, Harry mused as he watched Trevor try to hop away from Neville's grasp.

"I hope you don't mind if we sit in here, do you? All the other compartments are full," Hermione asked Harry even as Ron sat himself down beside Neville.

Harry just shook his head, not really trusting himself to speak at the moment.

"Great!" Hermione piped, plopping herself down next to him, "I'm Hermione Granger, by the way," she said, "And that's Ron Weasley," the red-head gave a little wave, "And that's Neville Longbottom."

Harry could see Neville tensing slightly, _probably expecting me to ask him for an autograph as I stare at him in awe_, he mused to himself. Instead, the eleven-year old only shrugged in response and turned back to the window, intent on ignoring the three teens as much as possible. This was certainly not at all how he had planned things. They weren't even supposed to know he **existed**! If he gave into the temptation of talking to them now, he just **knew** they were going to drag him into whatever trouble they get into. It was a given when you considered Harry's own brand of special 'luck'. Thus he ignored them in hopes that they thought him to be a Slytherin sympathizer or something similar and thus ignore him in return. Harry almost sighed in relief when Ron not-so-subtly complained about purebloods, Slytherins and stuck-up ungrateful brats in general, Hermione trying to shush him at his side.

But Harry knew better than to let his guard down now. Somewhere out there, Fate was watching him and ready to strike the moment his guard was down. Knowing the immortal probably planned this all along and undoubtedly had more to come, Harry wasn't about to let the omnipotent being win and glared stubbornly out the window throughout the whole train ride.

He just wished Neville Longbottom would stop staring at him at the same time.

-

When Hermione mentioned back in his fourth year, how she wouldn't fancy crossing the lake in this weather, he had whole heartily agreed as they climbed into the **dry** thestral drawn carriages. Gloomily, Harry wondered vaguely if this was the **real** reason why Fate wanted to be a first year. He was thoroughly soaked.

The rain poured down in buckets as the first years scurried towards the tiny little boats they were to take them across the huge lake, Hagrid bellowing loudly across the many ducked heads trying miserably to keep the rain out of their eyes. Stepping into the first boat he could reach, once again Harry thought Fate was a sadist when he realised he had, out of **all** the boats, gotten into the one with none other than Dennis Creevey. The only kid to have fallen into the lake. Terrific. Harry prayed he wouldn't take him and the others in the boat down with him…

Up in Wherever, Fate cackled wildly as another idea popped into his/her/its head. Harry may have wanted to be inconspicuous but what fun is in that? Gathering his/her/its almighty Whatever powers, Fate let loose the freak burst of wind on the unlucky souls beneath much earlier than it had the first time...

Back in the little boat that was thankfully held up by magic and would not sink from all the rain, Harry – to no avail – tried to stop the youngest Creevey from looking over the side of the boat. Normally, he would agree that the lake was certainly very interesting to gaze into but in circumstances such as this, it was far wiser to stay put with both hands **inside** the boat.

Unfortunately for little Dennis (and Harry's rising headache), he paid no heed to Harry's warnings and was leaning precariously over the side when a sudden unexpected gust of wind rocked the little boat violently and – to Harry's chagrin – Dennis fell in.

"Ahh! Help! I can't swim!"

Horrified, the other first years (including the now face-palming Harry) also leaned over and watched as Dennis flailed around in the murky water, trying desperately to stay afloat. They tried to reach for him, hoping to catch one of those flailing limbs to pull the boy back onto the boat. Their arms were too short though, and Creevey seemed to always be just out of reach.

_Gah! Who saved Dennis before?_ Harry thought desperately, _Hagrid?_

But Hagrid, leading the little boats slowly towards the castle, had not seen what had occurred and all attempts to catch his attention were useless under the sound of crackling thunder and crashing waves.

The squid? Yes, the squid! But… where in the world is that overgrown seafood stick?!

Little by little, the tiny boat was leaving the sinking Creevey behind. Glancing at the two panicking eleven year olds beside him still trying to get Hagrid's attention (_Can Hagrid even swim?_ Harry wondered idly, especially with Hagrid's size, _I think he just pulled him out last time…_), Harry groaned once more, _Bah… My Hero Complex is tingling…_ And with only a huff as a warning, the two panicking eleven year olds watched with elevated horror as Harry jumped into the lake and its treacherous waves.

As he struggled against the waves, Harry strove towards where he had seen the other boy last. His luck kicked in as suddenly, he felt the grip of another hand grasping desperately onto his. With a strong pull, he pulled the coughing Dennis out from beneath the lake and kicked harder to keep himself and the clinging boy afloat.

_Stupid child's body!_ Harry thought angrily as the weight of another boy started to take its toll on him, _I guess I have no choice_… already cursing Fate mentally for forcing him into situations like this, he flicked his hand lightly (his bloody wand was in his bloody trunk…) and silently cast a floating charm and a bubblehead charm on them both. Ignoring the awed look on Creevey's face as the boy realised he could breathe and float with no problem now; Harry squinted into the distance until he caught sight of bright lights with a mental sigh of relief and began the slow, grueling journey towards the castle.

Fortunately, when they had finally reached the lake's edge, Madam Pomphrey and the various other frantic professors were searching anxiously for them and thus, they were wrapped up nice and warm towels, a large chunk of chocolate in hand, and sent off towards the Hospital Wing immediately.

Unfortunately, Dumbledore was there as well, eyes twinkling madly as he commended Harry on his bravery and his decidedly advanced spellwork. And as Harry's carefully crafted plan of being as inconspicuous as possible shattered all around him, the old coot then had to nerve to offer him a lemon drop.

**Damn you, Fate!**

-

Harry hated Dumbledore. He really did.

Morning had come and the headmaster **insisted** (read ordered) that he and Creevey to be sorted in front of the whole school. Harry had paled dramatically at that and wondered when the nightmare would end (though, seeing Madam Pomphrey tell off Dumbledore for upsetting her patient was funny...). Dreading the spectacle that was sure to come, he practically dragged his feet as he grimly followed McGonagall towards the Great Hall where the whole school was apparently eagerly awaiting the arrival of the young hero (Harry gagged) who risked his life to save another (as well as preventing a law suit that would've surely followed had Dennis Creevey died).

He was not disappointed.

The Hall broke out in raucous applause as soon as he stepped inside, the Weasley twins in particular hooting loudly in the background, though thankfully, the Slytherins remained their disdainful selves. Harry could almost kiss them.

Unfortunately, he also felt like crying. Anonymity was just a passing dream now. Damn Dumbledore. Damn him and his twinkling eyes.

Scowling openly now, Harry miserably trudged forward, the blasted happy-go-lucky Creevey boys (Colin had come up to the hospital wing to check up on his brother and to thank his brother's saviour once more) practically dragging him towards the front of the hall by his arm, to where McGonagall was waiting patiently with the sorting hat. Yep, definitely regretting saving the brat now.

As Dumbledore motioned to the students for silence, McGonagall read out the names of the last two to be sorted.

"Creevey, Dennis!" happily skipped over to join the clapping Gryffindors and his even happier brother at their table as "Skywalker, Harry!", filled with renewed dread, reluctantly placed the Sorting Hat upon his head, the rest of the Hall waiting with bated breath for the result.

Harry had given his sorting much thought before coming to Hogwarts. He knew that being in a certain house meant he was more likely to bump into certain people, something he definitely wanted to avoid. And while, all chances for anonymity had flown out the window, every little bit counted! So Gryffindor and Slytherin had obviously been crossed off, never to be spoken of again. That left, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. His initial choice had been Hufflepuff but he then he realised, with Cedric in that house, it didn't seem the best choice. However, with his smarts (i.e. not much), he didn't think the hat would allow it. So Hufflepuff it is! Now he just had to make the Hat realise the **absolute need** for Harry to be sorted into the badger house and none other.

"You don't need to worry about that, Mr. Potter, Fate has told me all about you," the Hat suddenly mentally spoke to him.

Harry froze, if Fate had told the Hat... then he was screwed. Damn it all!

The Hat laughed, "Now, now, Mr. Potter. No need to be upset. While, in fact you are correct that Fate wished for me to place you in Gryffindor, I'll be doing no such thing. I have a score to settle with him/her/it you see, and so I'll be sending you to your own choice of house."

Harry sighed with relief, "Thanks, Hat. I owe you one."

"Don't thank me just yet," Harry could practically hear the smirk in its voice and felt a chill go down his spine but before he could question it... "HUFFLEPUFF!"

A deafening roar sounded throughout the Hall, making Harry wonder if this alternate universe was filled with Hufflepuffs with a constant Sonorus cast on their voices.

"What?!" someone from the Gryffindor table shouted, "He should be a Gryffindor because of his bravery!"

"No! Didn't you hear what spells he had used to save the other boy?! He should be a Ravenclaw!"

Though of course, this was barely above the raucous applause from the Hufflepuff table. Slytherin was the only silent table, sneering at the rest of the Halls antics. Harry wasn't surprised; after all, not only did Harry himself have a muggle sounding surname, the one he had saved was also a muggleborn.

Hurriedly without seeming so, he made his way to the Hufflepuff table, sitting as far down the table as he could. As the raucous carried on, Dumbledore standing up for silence and the staring began in full, he wished Voldemort would appear and put him out of his misery.

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hopefully a new chapter will be soon... but u noe what they say, the more you review, the more likely ill update! :D (y r u looking at me like that? a little begging never hurt anyone... pleeeeeeease review?) btw... why have i yet to recieve a flame? everyone seems to recieve at least one but i havent... not that i want one but just curious...


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

A.N.: **yaaaaaaaaaaay reviews :D thaaaaaaaaaaaaaank yooooooooooooou!! here is the next chapter of FFT! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! (though the ending is kinda bland... damn...)**

Warnings: Slash (though not yet) and warnings of the usual unbetadness :P and maybe OOCness? Though I guess it's to be expected with this kind of plot... plus I wuv messing around with their personalities :D

Word Count: 3949

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**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 2.**

Harry twitched.

Peeking round the corner, see could see **them**. The bushy browned haired one nagging the ears off the freckly red-haired one. No doubt about the amount of progress the latter has made preparing for his OWLS next year (it went without saying though, the answer was obviously **non-existent**).

Harry stared at them silently. He had DADA now but to get to the defense classroom he'd have to pass through here. A part of him knew, **rationally** the two would just ignore him (those two were always off in their own little world when they bickered) and Harry would slip into class nary a minute later. **However**, knowing his luck and – Harry turned his eyes towards the ceiling warily – a certain immortal, making his way past Hermione and Ron would be likethe day Dumbledore walked up to Voldemort and snogged him.

Bad things would happen.

People would be scarred for life.

The apocalypse.

You get the picture.

So Harry watched them carefully, a brilliant plan slowly being concocted in that devious mind of his. Surely, someone of his advanced knowledge and wisdom would be able to come up with a solution to this problem. He just needed a nudge in the right direction. That was when something touched his shoulder.

**Something touched his shoulder**.

Harry shrieked loudly, immediately fearing the worst.

Spinning around, he stared wide-eyed at the equally shocked Neville Longbottom. Harry's heart thumped loudly in his chest.

"Ah... I'm sorry... I didn't mean to surprise you like that..." the brunette offered weakly after a tense silence.

Harry continued to stand there shock-still and stared at him like he'd grown an extra head; one that was the exact replica of Severus Snape. And Gilderoy Lockhart. **Combined**.

Neville looked at the frozen Hufflepuff uncertainly, "Erm... Is there... something on my face?" he asked, laughing nervously.

No reaction.

The brunette twitched slightly as that intense emerald eyes continued to be directed at him. He was starting to get used to everyone staring at him being a celebrity and all but this... This wasn't the stare off a star-struck first year. He didn't know what it was but it was something different all together. It was strangely... comforting.

...and a little freaky.

"Neville? Is that you?" the Boy-Who-Lived gave a small mental sigh of relief when he heard Hermione's voice, a moment later appearing from around the corner, Ron right behind her giving him a quizzical look.

"Heya, mate," Ron greeted, "I thought Sprout wanted you to help her with something?"

"Yeah, I needed to grab some stuff from my trunk but I'm heading over there now..." Neville trailed off as his gaze slid back over to the strange first-year he had been talking to.

Harry had looked away from Neville at the same time as the brunette had, heart thumping even faster as Hermione and Ron appeared.

A single mantra ran through his head; oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my **god**, **oh my god!**

It was around then that the other two Gryffindors had followed Neville's gaze and realised they weren't alone. Hermione seemed to recognise him instantly as the boy from the train (**oh my GOD!**) while Ron's face twisted in confusion, wondering what the Hufflepuff was doing there.

Harry looked at Neville. Then he looked at Hermione. Then he looked at Ron. Then he looked at Neville again. And finally, he did the most rational thing one could do when you were in his situation.

He stomped on Ron's foot.

**Hard.**

The red-head howled in pain, foot raised so he could clutch it in his hands, attempting to stem the pain. He hopped awkwardly to the side, unable to maintain his balance. Having left a clear opening, Harry seized this opportunity and streaked past them, tearing off down the corridor leaving the three older teens to gape incredulously at his back.

Up in Wherever, Fate cackled, clutching his/her/its stomach in uproarious laughter. He/She/It didn't have to do a single thing.

-

"Ow..." Ron moaned, massaging his aching foot. For the runt's small size, he sure packed a lot of power...

Hermione humphed, "Well, you certainly deserved it," she said, still angry from their previous argument.

"What?" Ron whined disbelievingly, "What did I ever do to him?"

Neville didn't know what to say. He turned around when someone started snickering behind him. His gaze fell on a smirking blonde and the two hulking masses that followed him around everywhere, "Malfoy," he greeted coolly.

The smirk on the blonde's face just widened, "My, my, Longbottom. Never thought I'd see the day the **Golden Boy** terrorises an wimpy, little Puff. You scared him shitless."

Hermione glowered at him, "Neville wasn't doing anything of the sort! That boy is obviously just really shy. If anyone's doing the terrorising, it's **you**."

Draco Malfoy just gave her an uninterested look, "Whatever, Granger," he said before turning his smirk on Neville again, "I think big, bad Longbottom here can defend himself," the blonde snickered, his two apes following his lead almost immediately, "But you, Weasel. Beaten up by that same wimpy Puff?" Malfoy gave a full-blown laugh.

Ron's face reddened, fists clenching, "You..."

Neville blocked out whatever was said afterwards as he turned slightly to glance down the corridor the first-year Hufflepuff had ran down. That pale, wide-eyed look that had come across the boy's face as he stared at Neville came to the forefront of his mind. And then he wondered; _Am I really that scary?_

-

Harry barely held back his flinch when Moody walked in. The man's keen eyes would have immediately picked it up and Harry would've found himself in a world of trouble. But then again... maybe Moody wouldn't have noticed... after all, this wasn't actually Moody was he? No, this was Crouch jr. polyjuiced to look like the sharp and slightly insane ex-auror.

Harry felt sick to his stomach.

But then again... would Crouch really need to come? Since Voldemort had already gotten back his body, would there be any need for the Death Eater to take this role again.

But then again... Voldemort could be using he ruse to get his hands on his arch nemesis. With Neville in his grasp or, even worse, dead, wouldn't that be the perfect way for the Dark Lord to make his comeback? The perfect way to restart his reign of terror? Striking down the one who had brought about his downfall and the beacon of hope of the wizarding world...

But then again...

Harry's brows furrowed; all this was starting to give him a headache.

Then out of nowhere a hand slammed down onto his desk, "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!"

Harry jumped a mile out of his seat, hand clenching his chest; _this can't be healthy for my heart_, he thought. Seeing the frown on Moody's face though, he muttered a soft apology, a sheepish look on his face. Thankfully, the ex-auror just grunted and continued on with his lesson. Harry tuned him out again – nothing he could learn in a first-year class could possibly be new to him. He'd already graduated after all, not to mention he'd even defeated a Dark Lord!

So Harry's thoughts went round and round in his mind as he tried to come to a decision as to what to do about the DADA teacher when a particular thought struck him.

_What's wrong with me?_ He thought incredulously, _Why do I need to do anything __**at all**__?_

And so it was with that, Harry happily sat back in his chair totally unaware of the calculating look Alastor Moody gave him in the corner of his eye...

-

Neville and Hermione were studying together in the library when they saw something very peculiar. A small shadow whizzed through the doors, disappearing into the rows of bookshelves. Not moments later, a small black head peeked out, emerald eyes narrowed as they analysed his surroundings.

_It's that same Hufflepuff_, Neville realised, recognising that unique eye colour immediately. Potter and his mother also had the same coloured eyes yet at the same time, they were completely different. There was something about this boy's eyes caught his attention, drawing him in. They made him think of the rare _Rymaldus_ plant that glowed emerald green under the soft light of the midnight moon.

Neville blinked, _that was a weird thought..._

"Is that the runt again?" Ron grumbled as he finally arrived to join them in studying, albeit very begrudgingly.

Hermione hummed non-committally as they blatantly stared at the strange boy, wondering what he was doing. Neville frowned slightly when he realised they still didn't know his name.

_Maybe that'll change today_... he thought when those emerald eyes finally gazed in their direction. _Or maybe not_... when those eyes narrowed even further before they ducked back behind the bookshelf, disappearing for good this time it seemed. Ron scowled and strode forward.

"What are you doing?" Hermione frowned at his back.

"Just a little talk," was Ron's answer.

But it was enough to set Hermione off, "What?! Get back here Ron!" she hissed. Unfortunately, he obviously wasn't listening, "Neville?"

Neville's frowned deepened as he stood and quickly followed the red-head.

Meanwhile, Harry scowled darkly at some random, innocent looking book. Why the hell did he keep running into **them**? It seemed this Neville was a lot more studious than he had ever been which would explain why the three of them would spend the weekend in the library instead of in the dorms, playing chess or exploding snap while Hermione glowered at them darkly from some corner as she did her homework. This was obviously, once again, the doing of a certain immortal.

Harry finally gave into the urge and shook his fist angrily at the ceiling.

"Hey, you," a voice called out from his right. Harry hastily dropped his hand, pretending to look like as if he was merely trying to reach a book. He then turned his head slowly to stare at the intruder and cocked a solitary eyebrow at him, "Yes?" he said coolly.

That just made Ron angrier as he stomped towards Harry, "YOU-!"

"Ron!" another male voice cut in and Neville Longbottom appeared behind Ron, "That's enough," he said sternly before he turned to smile at Harry, raising a hand to shake, "Hello again." Beside him, the red-head spluttered in disbelief.

Harry eyed that hand speculatively. Alarm bells rang angrily in warning in his head but he really did want to get to know his friends again and for them to acknowledge him... It'd only been a week but he really did miss his friends...

Maybe he'd give in just this one time... Surely one handshake wouldn't be too bad...

And so Harry raised his hand, shaking ever so slightly as his brain screamed at him to stop. He pushed the thought back ("OMG! Don't do it! NoooOOooOOoo!" his brain shrieked pleadingly even as Harry stuffed it in a metaphorical box), encouraged by the soft smile on Neville's face. But just as their fingers were to touch, another voice cut in.

"What are you two doing here?"

Harry jumped back in surprise, the smile on Neville's face faltering; _So close, damn it!_

"No amount of reading could possibly help an idiot like you Weasley," the voice sneered, "In fact, I'm surprised a plebian like you can read at all."

Harry blinked at the newcomer as Ron's face started to match his hair. It was that tall boy he had seen trailing the other Harry Potter on the train. The teen was alone at the moment, the other three Gryffindors nowhere in sight. He'd heard about his other self from smatterings of gossip here and there. Apparently, the other Harry was a prankster, taking on the legacy of Marauders with much vigour. But unlike his predecessors, he wasn't much loved at all by the Hogwarts students as he had the reputation of being a bully on top of the pranking. However, this other boy... he hadn't heard about him. Who was he?

His dark black hair had grown past his shoulders, tied back neatly by a single red band. Brilliant blue eyes that stared back at them reminded him of Dumbledore however, they held none of the warmth that could be found in the Headmaster's eyes. Instead, they were as cold as ice, sharp enough to pierce one's very soul. Those eyes flickered towards Harry and not for the first time, the Hufflepuff felt a sense of deja vu. What was it about this boy that was so familiar?

"Fuck off, Black," Ron replied crudely.

_...wait... __**Black?!**_

Neville's eyebrows knitted together in confusion as the Hufflepuff stiffened visibly, eyes going impossibly wide once more. He reached forward to touch the boy's shoulder in concern, "Hey, are you okay?"

_**Black, Black, Black, Black, Black...**_ Harry thought, _**Oh my God, that's who he reminded me of! SIRIUS!**_

And with that, Harry's mind shut down, his eyes rolled back and he crumpled to the floor in a dead-faint.

"Hey!"

_Heaven have mercy on our poor souls: Sirius Black has a __**son**__._

-

Harry blinked. _Okay... where the hell am I now?_

He remembered being in the library and his annoyance at bumping into the Golden Trio again. He remembered Neville's smile and then he remembered the name Black. Fate seemed to have skipped over the slight detail of Sirius having a son. **Wonderful**.

Harry sighed, it wasn't that he didn't love his Godfather – no, Harry adored him with all his heart. It's just that Sirius the Godfather was very different to Sirius the Father and Sirius the Father was a very unfathomable idea as Sirius had never really grown up despite having lived through the thick of a wall and spent more than a decade in Azkaban.

_Hmm,_ Harry mused, _maybe here, it's different and Sirius actually acts his age._

A mature Sirius.

Harry shivered slightly: a very scary thought indeed.

"Oh, Harry!" a happy-go-lucky voice chirped up from behind him.

Harry froze, recognising that voice immediately, fear for the well-being of his dignity and pride escalating to ne'er before been reached heights and then, almost as immediately, Harry took off in the opposite.

"Hey! I'm over here!" the voice pouted. Harry walked a little faster.

"Haaaaaaaaaarry!" Said human began to run.

"Fine, if that's how you want to play!" And then with a loud pop, the **thing** that Harry least wanted to see in his short life appeared before him, forcing him to stop.

And then immediately tear off into another direction.

**Pop**. "Harry!" the immortal chirped, appearing before Harry again. Harry spun again.

**Pop**. "Haaaaarrry!" another appeared.

**Pop.** **Pop**. "Harry!" "Over here, Harry!" Two more appeared, blocking Harry's path. Emerald eyes stubbornly stuck to staring at the white floor as he changed directions once more.

**Pop. Pop. Pop. Pop. Pop.**

More and more of the same immortal appeared all around Harry until there was no where for him to escape.

"Harry!" one cried out.

"You can't escape, Harry!"

"Harry, be a good boy!"

"Haaaaaaaaaarry!"

"Harry, Harry, Harry!"

"**Alright!**" Harry finally screamed, "**What do you want?!**"

**Pop**. And suddenly, there was only one.

He/She/It pouted at Harry, "What? Do I need to reason visit my favourite toy?"

Harry merely gave him/her/it a dry look.

The immortal huffed, "Fine, if you're going to be that way, then I guess you don't want to hear why Sirius has a son..." he/she/it trailed off nonchalantly.

Harry groaned, "Alright, alright... I'm sorry. Could you **please** tell me why Sirius has a son?"

The immortal hummed non-committally, "Only if you promise to do something in return..."

Emerald eyes narrowed.

"It's nothing bad, really!"

Harry remained utterly and entirely sceptical.

"I just want you to be friends with him."

Harry's brows furrowed; that didn't sound **too** bad... "Why?"

Fate sighed, "He doesn't have a lot of... friends, you see, and he's such a nice boy, really. I don't want him turning to the Dark side just because of who his father his."

Harry frowned, thinking about how that could describe a certain annoying What's-His-Name as well, "Why would he turn Dark because of Sirius? And it's not like he's in Slytherin..."

Fate gave a wry grin, "No, not because of Sirius. It's because of his **other** father."

Harry's eyebrows shot up into his fringe, "...his what?"

"Remus Lupin-Black," he/she/it grinned.

"He- Wha- Huh...?" Harry's mouth fell open in surprise, utterly flabbergasted, "**Remus is his WHAT**?! **Siruis and Remus are WHAT**?!"

"They married!" the immortal giggled, "And then they had a big, bouncing, baby boy!"

"**WHAT**?!" Harry's brain exploded, "Why?! HOW?!"

"You're parents didn't die," Fate explained, "So Sirius didn't get taken to Azkaban and subsequently proposed to Remus. They got married and then used a super-duper-magical potion to have a baby. And as for why..." the immortal shrugged, "Fangirls."

"WHA-" Harry paused, brain backtracking on what he/she/it had just said, "Wait... what was the last thing you just said?"

Fate shrugged once more, "Well, I suppose the term fanservice may be more appropriate here," the immortal said with a cheeky grin.

"F-F-Fan- ...wah?"

"Anyway!" Fate perked up again, pushing Harry to a door that had appeared from nowhere, "It's time for you to wake up! Now, don't forget what you promised!"

"But I didn't promise anyt-!" But he didn't get to finish as he was promptly shoved into the shiny blue portal.

Everything turned black for a moment. Then realised this was actually because he had his eyes shut. From what he could gather, he seemed to be sitting on something warm and soft and leaning on something similarly warm and soft.

"...take him to Madam Pomphey," a voice said.

"Wait!" Harry's eyes snapped open as soon he heard that dreaded name of all names, "No Madam Pomphrey!" he cried, arms flailing, "I'm okay, I'm okay! There's no need for me to go see Madam Pomphrey!" _Again_... he thought with a small sob. It was bad enough he'd already gone once before even the school year began!

"...Are you sure?" worried brown eyes leaned over him.

Harry froze, eyes widening ever so slightly as he finally realised his position. Slowly but surely, he raised himself up, and turned to look at the brunette beside him stiffly, "Why... am I on your lap?" he dead-panned.

Ron Weasley scowled, "He caught you when you fainted. Personally, I would have just let you fall on the ground but evidently, he has more patience for ungrateful, obnoxious, little brats like you."

"Ron!" Hermione huffed, but Harry ignored them in favour of narrowing his eyes at the strange slight flush that streaked across Neville's cheeks. _...He's very pretty_, he thought absentmindedly.

And then he immediately face-palmed; _What the hell was __**that**__?!_

Neville gazed at the first-year worriedly once more, "Are you sure you're alright? If you've got a headache, I'm sure Madam Pomphrey would have a-"

"I'm fine!" Harry almost snapped but held himself back. The teen **did** catch him after all when he'd fainted. Hurriedly, he hoisted himself away from Neville's lap, intent on getting away from here as fast as he could, "Thanks," he mumbled and turned to take off...

...only to collide with a strong chest.

"Ow," Harry grumbled as he rubbed his abused nose, annoyed his attempt at escaping was so soundly thwarted. The black-haired teen he had run into merely raised an unconcerned eyebrow at him.

"And where are you going?" he said.

Harry scowled but didn't answer.

So Ron took it upon himself to do it instead, "And what are **you** still doing here, Black? If we see someone looking for a wannabe, we'll direct them to **you**," he sneered, "Otherwise, **get** **lost**!"

Harry watched as the dark-haired teens eyes darked, his fists clenching at his side, "I know you're pathetic, Weasley, there's no need for you to insult **yourself**. In any case, who says I wanted to stay in the first place!" he said defensively, "The only reason I'm here at all because **you** are blocking me from getting a book!"

Behind him Ron growled and he could vaguely hear Hermione scolding the red-head, Neville held Ron back from pummelling the other Gryffindor as he focused his attention on the expression on the dark-haired teens face and what he had just said. He couldn't help but be reminded of all the times Draco had expressed concern for him only to be rebuked by Ron leading to another one of their infamous fights. And so, despite the very good reason of anything-Fate-suggests-would-rather-die-first, Harry found himself considering the idea trying to befriend the boy before him. Plus... wouldn't that also give him a chance to meet Sirius and Remus?

Thus, against all rationality as well as **sanity**, he stared into those familiar blue orbs and said simply, "Thank you."

Silence fell over the group as the four older teens stared at him in surprise. Harry offered the black-haired teen a shy smile.

Black regained his blank expression, staring back at him, "...What?"

"I said, thank you," Harry repeated, giving him the best wide-eyed, innocent smile he could possibly.

It seemed to work, "Er... You're... welcome?" the dark-haired teen said, looking a little lost.

Harry took a risk, throwing away all logic as he leaned forward and grasped one of Black's hands with both of his and shook it, smiling widely all the while, "I'm Harry Skywalker. What's your name?" Three jaws hit the floor behind him, mouths wide open.

The taller teen stiffened but Harry pretended not to notice, "Orion Black."

"It's nice to meet you, Orion!" Harry chirped. He opened his mouth to say something else but just then, the bell sounded for the beginning of class. Emerald eyes widened, "Crap! I've got to get to Potions!" Hurriedly, he slung his bag over his shoulder and ran out, shouting, "Seeya later, Orion!" over his shoulder as he waved, getting a disapproving glare from Madam Pince and leaving four stunned teens behind him.

"What... just happened?" Ron said after finally picking his jaw off the ground.

And for once, not even Hermione had an answer.

* * *

o.o


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

Warnings: Slight slashy undertones, warnings of the usual unbetadness, screwed up personalities (I like to experiment :O) and plotholes the size of Uranus (yes, I'm lame like that... live with it :P)

Note 1. **LOTS OF LOVE AND THANKS TO The Plot Bunny Whisperer, momocolady, Shinigami Nanashi, Sabishii Kage Tenshi, NeverEnchained, getaiyou, numberman123, 917brat, Guardian Dimension, Saturnblue, book-zealot, PirateCaptainBo, Shinigami Rachi, TheOneWhoIsAddictedToHPfics, Mariel Nightstalker, animelava, lemmesee, Riotwave, sam3tron, KuroxTenshi, BEE, Nori-kuukuu and xDelta-Ha-chanx!**

Note 2. Harry is, unfortunately, normal in this chapter :( wow, I hate this one so much... probably because I've only rewritten this chapter twice lol Next chapter will be funnier, promise! (or least I hope so D:)

Note 3. It's also a bit rushed D: couldn't figure a way to fix it though... might rewrite it...

Note 4. What the hell do I do with Snape?! Hmm.. er.. he just.. well.. hates Harry and that is that? Blah..

Note 5. Once again... wow, I updated o.O (blame delays on Maplestory haha...)

Note 6. I gotta stop having all these notes but I can't help myself... WordCount: 4268

* * *

**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 3.**

"Ha-hah!" someone suddenly exclaimed making Harry jump up in surprise. Emerald eyes blinked rapidly as his brain froze analysing his surroundings. _Is this... hell?_ He wondered vaguely.

"Haha, very funny," the original voice said sarcastically as if reading his thoughts, "No, this is my room actually."

Emerald eyes narrowed as they took in the unwelcome form of Fate, surrounded by many of what Harry deemed the **creepiest** looking stuffed dolls he had ever seen, and if he listened closely, he could hear **screaming** in the background. _Certainly looks like it_...

Fate rolled his (yes, the author has finally decided that Fate is a he for a very important reason – definitely not because she's getting lazier and lazier... certainly not!) eyes, "Zeus and the other Gods of Olympus managed to convince Ra and his friends to play laser tag with them. They've been screaming their heads off ever since, running around like idiots trying to shoot each. Being all-powerful has destroyed every stealthy bone in their bodies," he said with a snort.

Harry blinked, "...Ok-ay," he said a little uncertain of how he should have responded.

Silence.

More silence.

Finally Harry sighed, wanting to get this over and done with so he could go back to whatever it was he was doing before Fate brought him here, "What do you want," he said in a tone that suggested very much he was expecting something very horrible to happen to him in the near future.

Fate squealed happily despite being supposedly male, "I'm glad you asked!"

Harry just sighed again.

"I've finally figured it out!"

Harry quirked an eyebrow at him, "Figured out what...?" he said hesitantly, _Do I even want to know...?_

"It's nothing bad," Fate said nonchalantly, waving off the dubious look that crossed Harry's face, "I've finally figured out a terrific first name for you!" he chirped, attempting to glomp Harry in his glee.

Harry, of course, deftly skipped out of the way, "You're going to change my first name," he dead-panned from the relative safety of the opposite side of the room.

"Yep!"

"...And pray tell, what is it?" Harry said, staring at the immortal apprehensively. _It better not be..._

"Harken!"

Harry blinked again, "Harken," he repeated.

"Yep, Harken!"

_Well, that isn't so bad, I guess..._ Harry thought, wondering if maybe, for once he'd get out of this... he wasn't even sure what the term he was looking for was. Calm? Happy? **Sane**?

Hmm, maybe untraumatised. Unfortunately, that word doesn't exist. At least, not according to Spellcheck... (glares at squiggly red line)

"Hey, do you want to know how I came up with that name?" Fate didn't give Harry a chance to answer... not that the immortal would have listened anyway... "I was thinking hmm... Harry. Should I give you a whole new name or something similar? And then Retse came over and we were like, watching all this anime and the main character called one of his friends Gokuderu-kun. Apparently, Japanese people tack a -kun onto the end of names when addressing males younger or about the same age as them or something like that and I thought hmm... then that would make you Harry-kun! Or maybe, maybe Har-kun or Ry-kun! And then I was like, Har-kun... Har-kun... Harken! Like that guy in that Fire Emblem game I played! He was so cool! His name is cool too! And we can still get away with calling you Harry too! So, yeh, Harken!" Fate beamed happily at Harry, panting heavily as he hadn't take a single breath during his ramblings.

Harry just looked nonplussed.

"So, so?" Fate piped up again when he regained his breath, "Harken Skywalker; doesn't that sound so cool?"

"I guess..." _Could have been a lot worse_... Harry thought drily, the name Frodo popping into his head or, heaven forbid, Anakin. He didn't need to give random muggle-borns any more reason to stop him in the hallways just to say 'May the Force be with you'.

"Great!" Fate jumped up happily, "Okay, bye-bye now!"

"Wha-?" and the with a flash of light, the eleven-year old disappeared from sight.

"You should just leave him be, Fate..." a deep voice sighed behind him.

"But it's so much fun..." the immortal giggled before his eyes widened in realisation, "Oh! Dee-chan! You're back! Hooray!" he exclaimed as he skipped over to glomp the much taller, black-robed man, mindful of sharp scythe the other was holding.

Death A.K.A. The Reaper, having learnt by now that resistance was futile, merely sighed and let himself be hugged to er... death, "Don't call me, Dee-chan..."

-

When Harry woke, worried blue eyes and a crinkled brow hovered over him. _What the hell...?_

"You okay?" he asked.

"Er..." Harry shifted uncomfortably. Slowly, he raised himself into a sitting position. Emerald flickered around briefly to check his surroundings... _He made me faint in the middle of a hall-way just to give me a new name?!_ Harry mentally face-palmed.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he mumbled awkwardly as the taller teen helped him stand.

Orion Black shrugged, his face now expressionless, as he made to leave but a hand on his arm stopped him. He tilted his head slightly to look at Harry quizzically.

"Um... Thanks," Harry said, still feeling a little out of depth knowing this was Sirius' son. Orion nodded in acknowledgement but the hand remained glued to his arm. Harry racked his brain fiercely for something to say for, even if it had been Fate's idea, he really did want to make friends with the older teen. Before he could think of anything though, a bunch of Gryffindor students interrupted.

"G-get your hand off him and step away!" one of them said, pointing his wand at Orion as he glared at him.

Harry raised an eyebrow and looked at him in a way that clearly said 'Are you stupid?'. **Harry's** hand was Orion's arm, not the other way around! And what was he on about anyway...?

Orion scowled, "Don't be stupid," he said, echoing Harry's thoughts, "Put that thing away before you hurt yourself."

"Shut up, Werewolf!" another Gryffindor shouted, "You're nothing but Death Eater scum! Not even human!"

Harry's eyebrows disappeared into his fringe, Orion stiffening noticeably beside him. Apparently, the wizards in this dimension were even less tolerant of werewolves than his own. Huh, how pathetic.

"W-what did you say?!" the Gryffindors glared at him, some of their faces turning red very rapidly.

Harry blinked; he hadn't realised he had said that out loud... _Oh well... Whatever_, "I said, 'How pathetic'. This many of you against one person. And someone from your own house no less, what's **wrong** with you?" He'd dealt with enough of these bigoted ideals to last him a lifetime and he certainly wasn't going to put up with it even if he **was** in another dimension! And if they didn't like it... well he'd deal with them the same way he dealt with those idiots who dared harass his Moony!

"Hey, we're the ones trying to help you!" another Gryffindor spluttered angrily.

"Help me?" Harry scoffed, "I doubt you could even help each other find your way out of a cardboard box. Plus anyway, who says I need help? I certainly don't remember asking for it."

"He's a werewolf!" one of them shouted disbelievingly at him, as if it explained everything. To them, it probably did but to Harry...

"So what?"

Jaws dropped open.

Harry rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Idiots," he muttered under his breath as he readjusted his grip on Orion's arm and gently tugged the fourth year behind him. As they rounded a corner, he mumbled slightly, waving his wand discretely at the shocked bunch with a satisfied grin before tucking it safely back into his sleeve. Orion raised an eyebrow but hid a smile at the sight of the Gryffindors now each sporting donkey ears, muzzle and a tail.

They walked in silence for a while, the only disruption being when they Gryffindors finally realised what had happened, their screams of horror echoing through the strangely empty hallways. Eventually, the first-year stopped and turned to look at Orion. The older teen wondered what the boy was going to say... and why had he let himself he pulled along anyway...?

"Er..." Harry flushed in embarrassment, "I don't know where I'm going..."

Orion snorted and then stared at him for a moment, "You..." _really don't care that I'm a werewolf?_ was what he wanted to say but after so long... "don't you have class?"

Emerald eyes widened, "Merlin's crap on a wand!" Orion blinked at his... unusual choice of curses, "I've got Transfiguration! Erm..." Harry looked at Orion uncertainly, "I don't know where that is... could you tell me how to get there?" _Well, I've got to start somewhere_, Harry thought, _I really need to plan for something say when we meet..._

Harry blinked in confusion when Orion looked at him and walked off. When the older teen realised Harry wasn't following him, he turned his head to look back at him, "...I've got a free period. I can show you."

Harry's face broke into a wide smile, _This is going better than any plan I can come up with!_ "Thanks!" And (of which he would later vehemently dispute doing so) skipped after the fourth year.

It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

-

...that he was regretting slightly. Not that he didn't like Orion; no, that part he was more than happy with. While it had been difficult for Harry to find Orion at first ("So I had to harass a few people to find you... I'm not a stalker, damn it!" Harry scowled. Orion merely smirked that oh-so-irritating smirk at him.), eventually the taller teen had taken it upon himself to seek out Harry himself and more often than not, the two found themselves enjoying each others company and working on their respective homework in the peace and quiet of the library. No, the Orion-part definitely wasn't the problem. It was this **other** part that a certain immortal had thoughtfully (read intentionally) forget to inform him of.

Bitch.

(Retse paused in her typing and frowned, "Oh, wait. Fate's a male now isn't he? Hmm...")

Bastard, then.

"Stay away from him," Barry said as the three Gryffindors surrounded him.

"He's dangerous, you know," he continued, not giving the first-year a chance to comment, "We wouldn't want an ickle Puff-firstie like yourself to be hurt now, do we?"

Dean and Seamus snickered but Harken (A.K.A Sharry and the Harry that we all know and love) couldn't see what was so funny. Instead he frowned as he turned his gaze to his older counterpart, ignoring the two sniggering Crabbe-Goyle wannabes, "Why are you telling me this? Isn't he your friend too?"

Seamus snorted, "As if. The only reason Harry talks to him at all is because Harry's dad is friends with those monsters."

"Did I ask you to talk for me, Finnigan?" Potter growled coldly to the sandy-haired boy.

Harken watched in interest as Seamus paled, "S-sorry, mate..."

Emerald met emerald and not for the first time, Harken wondered why no-one ever compared him to the older teen. They were so similar in appearance and yet... "What I do is none of your business and my reasons are also my own," Potter told him icily, "Just stay away him."

If Harken didn't know better, he'd have thought he was talking to a jealous boyfriend...

Whichever the case, Harken really hated his life and since these boys were nice enough to volunteer themselves for Harken's anger management target practice, well... who was he to disappoint?

(evil grin)

Barely five minutes later, Harken looked down at the three unconscious students and smirked. To save the readers from eternal mental scarring, let's just say his... accomplishment involves some rather fetching if a bit draughty muggle hospital wear coupled with various other questionable additions (...OK I admit it, I might have gotten a _little_ lazy with this...). Emerald eyes then narrowed slightly, shoulders tensing as he heard the soft footsteps and the presence of someone coming up behind him. Unfortunately, it was a little too late for him to make his escape. He had nothing to worry about however... sort of.

"Well, well," an familiar but decidedly unwelcome voice spoke up as the platinum blonde stepped up to them, eyebrow quirked, "Isn't this interesting? Potty and his numbskull brigade... I believe this is what some would call _divine retribution_," his sneer turned calculating as he turned his stare towards the petite raven-haired child standing next to him, "By a first year Puff, no less..."

Harken merely stared back blankly, hoping to unnerve the Slytherin with a clear threat of what would happen to _him_ should the blonde annoy him like the Gryffindors had.

However, it only seemed to serve to amuse Malfoy, that oh-so-infuriating-trademark smirk of his growing wider and wider. He took a wide step forward towards Harken. The teen cursed himself mentally as he unconsciously mirrored him, his back hitting the wall behind him lightly. The blonde's eyes glinted at that, propping his arms on the wall, successfully trapping the smaller male. Harken immediately glared back defiantly even as, for some strange reason, suddenly felt every inch of his decidedly small stature, and feeling decidedly a little self-conscious.

But as the blonde leaned forward, common sense seemed to instantly all rush back into him, _What the hell am I doing? What the hell am I letting __**him**__ do?!_ But just as he was going to show the stuck-up prat exactly _how_ this first-year Puff had dealt with those annoying Gryffindors, another familiar character from the soap opera that was his previous life entered the scene.

Cedric Diggory was what you would call a model human. A studious Prefect with good grades. Star player and Captain of his house' Quidditch team. Loved by both his professors (well, except Snape, but he doesn't count...) and peers (likewise with the Slytherins) alike. Not to mention his dashing good looks and delightful personality. His friends would even say his mere presence would light up any room he walked into. He took all this in stride, of course, for he was also modest and a deeply caring person.

So it was obvious why, when seeing the aforementioned scene, indignation welled up inside him (it was even one of his own Puffs! The nerve!) as he stalked over and with one hand, deftly pulled the other blonde off the innocent child, "What are you doing?!" he hissed angrily (or at least, as much of an angry hiss as you would expect from a gentle Puff like Cedric).

"Diggory," Malfoy drawled disinterested, though his eyes told a completely different story, "Kindly cease manhandling me."

Cedric frowned and complied but not before placing himself between the two in a clearly protective manner making Malfoy sneered at his actions.

"I don't know what you think you were doing, Malfoy," Cedric growled, "But that doesn't mean-" his eyes suddenly caught sight of the pile of Gryffindor boys to the side and gaped at them openly, "**What the hell happened to them?!**"

Harken stiffened slightly behind him but Malfoy snorted derisively and said simply, "They annoyed me," finishing with an almost graceful shrug of his shoulders. Emerald eyes narrowed on him sharply, _what was Malfoy trying to pull? Why did he just take the blame?_

"_Annoyed you-?_ Malfoy! You can't just hex someone if they annoy you!"

Malfoy sneered, "And what are you going to do about it? _Take away twenty house points_?" he mocked.

Cedric didn't let him get to him however, having dealt with this kind of attitude often, and glared back, "That's exactly what I'm going to do. Twenty points from Slytherin _and_ detention with Filch for harassing a first year and hexing other students!"

Malfoy just scoffed, "Whatever," and walked away without another word.

Cedric and Harken silently watch the blonde disappear around the corner before the sixth year student turned to look at Harken in concern, "Are you alright? Did he... hurt you anywhere?"

Harry looked up at his words but couldn't reply as he stared up at the older male. It was one thing to notice him from a distance but to see undeniably how very... _alive_ Cedric was, was too much for him to handle. He tried to think straight but all that came up was **I killed you. It was my fault you died.** The blonde's death was one of those he could never reconcile himself for, could never forgive himself for. Cedric had been so wholly **innocent** and if Harken hadn't asked him to take the cup with him...

So Harken did the only thing he could do. He took a deep breath before swallowing heavily, "I'm fine. Thank you," he said softly as he took a step away, "Um... Excuse me," he said before he bolted down the corridor in the opposite direction of Malfoy, pretending he didn't hear the blonde's yell of "Wait!" and thought of only one thing.

_I __**will**__ save you Cedric Diggory_.

-

What Harken certainly didn't expect was, however, was for the sixth year to suddenly seek him out to just chat or study together. Apparently, the blonde had decided to look out for him and realising that the emerald-eyed boy had no friends within Hufflepuff (completely ignoring the fact that Harken **wanted** to be alone), he taken it upon himself to befriend the small boy. But what was first started through a sense of duty as a prefect soon became a firm friendship as the blonde realised just how mature Harken was and his amazingly extensive knowledge of magic and its workings.

That was how they come together as the strange study group they were now, meeting everyday in library. Cedric, Orion and himself. The first meeting had been slightly awkward, Orion a little disgruntled at the new addition while Cedric was startled at Harken's choice of friends. Eventually, they got over it (knowing they would have to at least tolerate each other to spend time with Harken before finally falling into easy camaraderie. (well, sort of...)

So it was like this that found Harken walking together with Cedric and Orion towards the Great Hall for lunch, discussing a new spell Cedric had learnt in Transfiguration. When they arrived in the Entrance Hall, they found themselves unable to proceed owing to the large crowd of students congregated there, all milling around a large which had been erected at the foot of the marble staircase.

"Cedric!" someone suddenly called out.

Three heads turned as an brunette ran towards them. He stopped in front of them, giving the blonde's choice of companions a weird look before giving the seeker his full attention, "Have you seen the sign yet? It's only a week away!"

Cedric looked confused, "What is?" and peered over the multitude of heads to glance at the sign, reading it out aloud for Harken's sake, knowing the raven-haired boy wouldn't be able to see.

_TRIWIZARD TOURNAMENT_

_The delegations from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang will be arriving at 6 o'clock on Friday 30__th__ of October. Lessons will end half and hour early –_

"Brilliant!" they heard Ron Weasley exclaim, who had also come round with his two best friends to see what the commotion was about, "It's Potions last thing on Friday! Snape won't have time to poison us all!"

"And Binns won't have time to bore us all to death, _thank Merlin_," Harken grumbled getting amused looks from his friends. But inside he was more than a little disgruntled; somehow he'd let the Triwizard Tournament totally slip from his mind...

_Students will return their bags and books to their dormitories and assemble in front of the castle to greet our guests before the Welcoming Feast._

...at least this time, there was no danger of him entering but... Emerald eyes slid sideways as he stared sadly at his new friend.

Grey eyes met him and blinked uncertainly, "What's wrong?"

Harken bit his lip lightly, "Are you going to enter?"

Cedric shrugged, "Probably. I know for one, my dad would want me to enter..." he grimaced slightly.

"Well... Be careful," Harken said, a little uncomfortably.

Cedric smiled and made to reassure his fears but Orion got there before he did, "You don't have to worry about that idiot, Harken," he drawled, "I doubt he'd feel it even if a comet crashed into his thick skull."

Cedric gave a loud bark of laughter drawing many curious stares, and reached around Harken to punch the fourth year on the shoulder, "Gee, thanks. You know what? I'm going to take that as a compliment," he said with a wide grin.

Orion grumbled to himself but both he and Cedric fell into silence as they stared at their mutual friend in concern as Harken merely looked down at the ground.

The next couple of weeks found Harken in a bit of a daze as deja vu struck him like lightning. He watched the foreign students arrived, his memories of the giant horses and colossal ship that rose from the lake as clear as the events in front of him. He watched as they brought out the Goblet of Fire and numerous students that stepped forward to put their name him. The twins sprouting long, white beards just didn't seem as funny as it did the last time as he tried to smile reassuring at Cedric as the blonde also dropped in his name. If there was anything he could do, it was to pretend that everything was going to be okay.

_Everything was going to be okay_.

And as silence fell over the Hall following Neville's name having be just spat out of the goblet, he could only look on sadly as the brunette's shocked gaze locked briefly with his sympathising ones. And his heart went out to him when the Golden Trio became two.

"Like them, Longbottom?" Malfoy said loudly, flashing his _Support CEDRIC DIGGORY – the REAL Hogwarts Champion!_ Badge as Neville and Hermione approached. "And this isn't all they do – look!"

He pressed his badge into his chest, and the message upon it vanished, to be replaced by another one, which glowed in green:

_LONGBOTTOM STINKS_

And then, as Nevile glared angrily, Hermione hissing at him to ignore them at his side, all those feelings from long ago rushed back into him... and he _snapped_.

"Leave him alone!" Harken shouted angrily, Cedric and Orion giving him stunned at the sudden outburst that was quite unlike the first-year they had gotten to know.

Malfoy seemed to recognise instantly despite their only encounter having happened weeks ago, his smirk widening challengingly, "And what would you do if I didn't?"

"Harken, wait-!" Cedric called out but it was too late. The first year already had his wand out, casting a wordless spell before anyone could react. He angrily slashed his wand horizontally from left to right in front of him, the tip spewing forth an invisible wave of magic they flew forward, hitting the group of students like a large gust of wind.

Cedric didn't have to worry however, Harken having learnt long ago not to let the blonde's taunts to get to him. What he had done was harmless but hopefully effective. As the students wondered what had happened, the badges suddenly glowed brightly and then...

_Support NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM – the REAL Hogwarts Champion!_

And then it flashed again, this time glowing red...

_DIGGORY STINKS_

Harken gaped at the badge in unconcealed horror, his face glowing red as brightly as the badge had moments ago. Sheepishly, he turned to look at his thankfully amused looking friends, "Sorry, Cedric. I didn't mean to..."

Cedric just laughed, patting Harken's raven locks softly as he did so, "I know, it's okay," he said, looking far too amused for someone who's just been insulted (though, to be fair, he'd gotten pretty immune to insults after spending so much time with Orion...) and then turned to look at the flabbergasted students seriously, "Harken's right though. There's no need for these petty insults," he said, talking to the his own housemates in particular," Longbottom and I have **both** been chosen to represent our school so I want you to stop being stupid and support **both** of us. Understood?" as the Hufflepuffs nodded numbly back at him, he continued, "Plus anyway, if Longbottom says he didn't put his name in, then I believe him," he said with a shrug even a people started to openly gape at him again, "Now... I'm going to have to confiscate those badges..."

As the blonde prefect did just that, Neville couldn't help but join the gaping masses. Cedric believed him? But why? He didn't seem so certain when they'd first talked about it... The brunette jumped when someone touched his shoulder and was surprised to find, when he turned around, not Hermione but _Harken Skywalker_ staring imploringly up at him, "Um..." he fumbled, cursing himself at his lack of eloquence.

"Are you okay?" the raven-haired boy asked.

"Yes, I am," and for the first time in a long time, he really did mean it, "_Thank you_," he said, trying to pour all his feelings and gratitude into those two words.

And it was a good thing too, for when emerald-eyed Harken Skywalker smiled beautifully back at him, Neville found himself completely lost for words.

* * *

Final Note. And as usual, please let me know what you think of this chapter so I'd know if I should rewrite something or other... Thanks :D


	5. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

Warnings: Slight slashy undertones, warnings of the usual unbetadness, screwed up personalities (I like to experiment :O) and plotholes the size of Uranus (yes, I'm lame like that... live with it :P)

**Note 1. Since it's Valentine's Day (well, almost), HEART CHOCOLATES AND ROSES TO MY WONDERFUL REVIEWERS :D – Sabishii Kage Tenshi, writerlover101, Orpheus Thanatos Messiah, Ie-maru, :D, Zula Fire, Moon Ecstasy, White Ivy, Shinigami Rachi, Kai Minimono, atiicia, Shadow Eclipse, momocolady, NeverEnchained, FairyButterfly, Sakina-chan, Youhooo, hakari3456, Lucretzia, Schizophrenic Kitten, Sony Boy, hollyivy7, SquirrelNutter412, 2008 and Erroneously! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!**

**Note 2.** I think I lost my funny bone... but then again, I guess it was bound to happen with Voldy killing everyone and everything... Unless I somehow kill him in some hilarious yet suitably inane way o.O

**Note 3.** There's a bit of a time-skip to watch out for in the middle... sorry, couldn't find a better lead up :(

**Note 4. **I **still** don't know what to do with Snape o.O Any ideas anyone? Or should I not bother with him at all beyond a basic background character? And no Barry and Malfoy this time... there should be more of them later... that is, if people actually want to see them anyway?

**Note 5.** Word Count: 4780

* * *

**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 4.**

Harken glared down at his Herbology book as, once again, a long finger reached out and poked him on the side of the head. _I take back what I said before_, he thought to himself, _Cedric Diggory is going to die a horrible, horrible death._

Beside him, Cedric Diggory leaned back slightly, warily eyeing the poor book his friend was trying to well... strangle...

"It's great and all that you study much," Cedric tried again when he realised that making Harry angry probably wasn't the best course of action (and that he'd like to very much get through this year alive), "But you really need to get out some more, take in the sunshine, maybe make a few friends," no response. Cedric sighed, "Where's Orion by the way?"

"Oh, McGonagall called him away. Some thing or other about his parents visiting..." Harken replied as he absent-mindedly recalled that it was the full moon and reminded himself to go visit the Hospital Wing later.

"What? Why? Is something wrong? Is Orion going to be okay?"

Harry blinked at the poorly veiled anxiety in Cedric's voice and finally glanced away from his book to give the blonde a raised eyebrow look. The sixth year coughed and turned away slightly, "Just... curious..."

Harken hid a smirk at the bit of red rising up on Cedric's neck, "I hadn't realised you were the masochistic type," he said innocently.

Cedric choked loudly, spinning around to look at him with wide eyes, "You- you-how-what-" he continued to splutter while Harry continued to smile innocently at him, cackling wildly inside.

"I... don't think that means what you think that means," the blonde said, once he got his spluttering under control, shifting a little uncomfortably.

The first-year blinked up at him, "But Orion insults you a lot, doesn't he?"

"Yes, he does," Cedric replied dejectedly, trying not to pout.

"...And you still like him."

"Well... yes," the blonde eventually admitted a little sheepishly.

"Masochistic," Harry repeated with a satisfied nod.

Cedric stared at him. "That's not how you define a masochist," he said slowly.

Harken blinked innocently up at him, "So how do you define a masochist?"

Cedric choked again, blush reappearing almost immediately.

"Well," a new voice huffed, though there was a tinge of embarrassment to it, "that's awkward."

"Granger!" Cedric gaped at them, "And Longbottom! I was just- This isn't what-" if it were possible, the blonde would have died from embarrassment there and then. Unfortunately for him, it wasn't.

Harken couldn't keep it in any more; he burst out in laughter.

Cedric scowled at him, realising he'd been duped, "You little bastard," he said, slapping Harry on the arm half-heartedly. He was happy to see his friend in high spirits again, even if it was at his expense. "So anyway, what can we do for you folks?" he looked at the two Gryffindors imploringly. They'd been throwing looks in their direction quite often the past week, Neville especially. Not surprising considering no one had believed the brown haired boy when he had said he hadn't put his name in the cup.

Except Harken, of course.

"We were wondering if we could join you," Neville spoke up, his voice not wavering the slightest despite looking a little nervous.

"Sure," Cedric smiled at them, "Maybe you could help me out. Har's been studying for hours and I've been trying to convince him to go out and enjoy the sun with me for a bit."

A confused expression slid onto his face when he received three blank looks in answer, "What?"

Harry snorted in amusement and looked back down to his book. Did Cedric really expect **Hermione Granger** of all people to help convince someone to **stop** studying?

Hermione smiled and shook her head, "It's nothing." Then to Cedric's further bafflement, the bushy haired Gryffindor practically pushed herself past Neville, plonking herself onto the seat next to Cedric that the other brunette had moved to take before giving Neville a **look**. Cedric watched as Neville's cheeks pinked, surprise growing when the normally mild-mannered Neville Longbottom scowled at his best friend before almost tentatively lowering himself onto the seat next to Harken.

Harken, sensing movement beside him, chose that moment to look up again. Neville smiled nervously at him. Harry smiled back at him before returning his gaze to his book. Cedric's eyebrows rose as the Gryffindor reddened further. A glance to his right found Hermione Granger practically **smirking knowingly** at her friend and when she turned, her brown eyes meeting his, Cedric fought the urge to lean back as far as possible from the decidedly **scary** glint in her eyes.

Instead, he coughed nervously before busying himself with his own textbook.

"So, what is it that you two are studying...?" Hermione questioned after a moment of strangely comfortable silence that relaxed the previously wary blonde.

"Well, we're studying-" Cedric didn't manage to finish when Neville suddenly blurted out-

"DRAGONS!"

Neville flushed again when the other three almost jumped out of their seats in surprise and at the disapproving look Madam Pince. "Sorry," he mumbled.

Cedric coughed, "Er... actually we're studying some Arithmancy..."

"Oh no, no," Hermione looked at him, wide-eyed, "What Neville is trying to say is that the first task is **Dragons**," she hissed, trying to keep her voice as low as possible yet still loud enough for their whole table to hear.

Cedric gaped at them. "Dragons?" he repeated weakly.

Harry smiled as he reached forward to pat the blonde on the arm reassuringly, "You'll be fine, Cedric. You're more than ready what with what we've taught ourselves the past month. I doubt they would've given you a task that can't be completed with just sixth year spells considering the age limit."

Cedric stood up, truly heartened by the smile on his friend's face, "You're right," he said confidently, "Excuse me for a moment," he said before rushing off into the rows of books, no doubt to do some research to back up the plan already forming in his head.

Meanwhile, Neville slumped down in his chair, Hermione patting his arm too.

"What's wrong?" Harken looked at him though he could already guess what was wrong.

"I'm only a fourth year, wouldn't know half the spells they do," Neville said dejectedly.

Harry frowned and pretended to look as if he was thinking though he also already knew what he was going to say. While Neville didn't fly like he could (Barry was the one accepted onto the Gryffindor team as seeker though, Harken thought smugly, the older boy hadn't been accepted until second year and wasn't **nearly** as good as he was), he **could** take a leaf out of Krum's book. And while it hadn't worked as well as the Bulgarian had hoped (considering the dragon had trampled half her eggs), it was most likely the best option for Neville.

"Well," Harken began, "a dragon's main weakness are its eyes so... you could try the Conjuntivitus spell."

Neville and, amazingly, Hermione looked at him in confusion, "Conjuntivitus?"

Harry nodded, "It causes pain in the eyes. I doubt they'd make you actually try to knock out a dragon considering it usually takes about half a dozen wizards to do that so a spell like that should give you enough time to complete whatever task it is they give you."

Neville stared at him while Hermione gave him a searching look, "That makes sense... where did you learn this spell by the way?"

Harry blushed slightly, _oops, I hadn't thought that far..._ "Er... well... I was just er... doing some... light reading?" he said eventually.

Immediately, a bright glint entered Hermione's eyes again and Harry got the feeling that he'd suddenly become Hermione's most favourite person in the entire world.

He didn't know whether to be happy or very, very scared. (or cry.)

Hermione smirked at him and Harken leaned back slightly in fear. Then she turned to Neville and said in a very serious voice, "The force is strong in this one."

Harry gaped at the bushy-haired Gryffindor and groaned loudly, "Oh Merlin, not you too!"

Cedric got back just in time to share confused looks with Neville as Harken banged his head onto the table with another groan while Hermione laughed at his pain.

-

Harken swiftly made his way toward the Hospital Wing. The others were in class and he himself had History of Magic but had opted to duck out of the classroom early on while Binns wasn't looking.

He'd much rather use this time to visit Orion without having Cedric follow him. Turns out, most people weren't privy to the knowledge that he was a werewolf; those in the know pretty much restricted to the older students in Gryffindor while the rest of the school was somehow blissfully unaware despite the Gryffindor's lack of subtlety and secrecy though he supposed that most likely a result of the segregation between the houses leading to no one even attempting to befriend Orion.

_Or it could be the work of my wacko other self_, he thought, recalling that strange encounter they had weeks ago. The older teen had actually never moved to confront him but then again, it may have been because he didn't want anyone to know he'd been outsmarted by a first year Hufflepuff. The older teen **did** however, glare at him at every chance possible earning them strange looks from their friends which both pointedly ignored in favour of attempting to burn a hole in the others head with their eyes.

In any case, carefully he peeked inside of the Hospital Wing, eyes narrowing as they scanned his surroundings for any potential threats. Thankfully, Madam Pomphrey was no where in sight and neither did there seem to be any other students around. Silently, he crept forward; Orion was probably in one of the rooms towards the back for privacy.

_I am a leaf on the wind_, Harry thought to himself as he quietly made his way past the beds. If Poppy caught him now... well, he **really** didn't want to think of the consequences of **that**. _I am a leaf on the wind. Silent, swift, agile-_

And then he tripped.

**CRASH!**

His messy black head immediately bolted up, his body following not a moment after as he sprinted toward his destination, flinging the door open (and closing it as softly as one could in a O-M-G-I'm-going-to-die panic) before he flung himself under the bed.

Seconds later, Madam Pomphrey bustled inside, a slight worried frown on her face as she stared at her only patient for the day, "Mr. Black, I heard a noise... Did something happen? Are you alright?"

Orion tried to look as innocent as possible (though it was a little difficult as all he wanted to do was laugh), "No, Madam Pomphrey. I heard it too though... but from outside?"

Unfortunately, unbeknownst to him, the look he used was very much alike one his father Sirius Black used in the aftermath of one of his pranks. But on the other hand, fortunately for him, it was but the first time he'd used it and was believed to take after his supposedly less mischievous father Remus Lupin and as such, Madam Pomphrey left the room with a nod (though not before casting him one last suspicious look – it was the reflex reaction all the adults had when faced with Sirius Black's patented innocent look).

When Orion's heightened hearing senses told him for certain that Madam Pomphrey was far away, he leaned over to pull up the side of his bed sheet, smile widening at his friend who had huddled there facing away from him, arms over his head as if that would prevent him from being seen or heard.

"She's gone," he said softly.

Harry shifted, sighing in relief as he wiggled out from beneath the bed before pulling up a chair next to him and plopping himself down on it, "That was close," he said, looking a bit pale from almost get caught by the Nazi Nurse.

Orion then had to nerve to smirk at him, "Serves you right. What are you doing here anyway?"

Harry gave him an 'Are you stupid?' look, "What else? I'm here to visit you and keep you company! Do you not want me here?" he mock pouted.

A flash of surprise appeared on Orion's face but he quickly wiped it away, but not fast enough before Harry noticed it sadly. He supposed he shouldn't have been shocked that people wouldn't come visit a werewolf during this time of month but still...

"No, no, that's not what I mean. It's just that most people wouldn't..." Orion tapered off softly, looking down as he fiddled with the hospital blankets. It was strange for Harry to see his normally brusque friend looking so meek.

"Well, I'm not like most people," Harry said firmly.

Orion lifted his head, staring at Harken for a moment before a smile lit his face, "No, you're not," he said softly.

Harry smiled back at him and the two spent the next couple of moments giving each other dopey smiles.

"Anyway, anyway!" Harry bounced in his chair when they finally snapped out of it, suddenly feeling hyper and with the need for a little more revenge. "I know something you don't know~" he said in a sing-song voice.

"Oh?" Orion replied, vastly amused by the mood his friend was in.

"**Someone** has a **crush**," Harry grinned almost evilly. _Cedric never __**did**__ tell me to __**not**__ tell Orion..._

The first-year blinked when the curious look on Orion darkened, his smile twisting into one that promised much pain, "So you finally noticed those looks Longbottom has been sending you, eh? The nerve of that little shit... No sense of morals... **Pedophile**... Wait 'til I get my hands on him... Preying on innocent little boys..." he grumbled to himself.

Harry's jaw dropped, "Wait- Wah-? Neville... **What?! ...**and who are you calling **little?!**"

Orion stared blankly at him, "Oh, that wasn't what you were going to talk about? Oops."

"What?! **No!**" Harry shook his violently, his head about to explode; **Neville** had a **bloody crush** on **him?!** "I was going to say **Cedric** had a crush on **you!**"

This time Orion's jaw dropped open, "**What?!**"

Instead of the dopey grins, this time they exchanged various looks of shock. Most of which included the standard widening of eyes, dropped jaw and the mental mantra of "O-M-G-W-T-F-?-!". And that was when Madam Pomphrey burst inside, alerted by the shouts of disbelief.

"Mr. Skywalker!" the affronted medic shouted.

Harken squeaked in surprise, immediately diving under the bed again, more as a survival instinct than anything else. A loud barking laughter broke Harry out of his surprise as he sheepishly peeked out from behind the bed sheet. Four amused faces stared back him and as he climbed back out from underneath the bed, it took all his will power to keep his jaw from dropping wide open as he realised who the two new additions were.

_Sirius and Remus_.

"Mr. Skywalker, I do believe you have class," Madam Pomphrey stated plainly, raising an eyebrow.

"Er..." Harry forced his eyes away from those familiar friendly faces and smiled hesitantly, "I... had Professor Binns...?" he argued weakly.

Madam Pomphrey huffed lightly and opened her mouth to speak but Sirius quickly cut in, "Aww, come on. Leave the poor boy alone, Poppy. It's not his fault he doesn't want to be bored to death...?" he said, giving her his most angelic look.

Poppy just rolled her eyes at him. Obviously, after knowing the man so long, the effect had weakened enormously.

Remus smiled, "It's okay, Poppy. We'll take care of everything. I'm sure you have lots of work to do and don't need us getting in your way."

Poppy Pomphrey sighed, "You could never be in my way, Remus," she said before she gave him an indulgent smile that made him blush lightly (and Sirius Black to smirk but it was best for all their sakes that she ignored that). Remus had always been her favourite since he'd first arrived in Hogwarts. So polite and responsible. So she nodded, "Alright. I'll leave them to your care. But," she gave them a stern look, favourite student or not, "if he shows any signs of tiredness, you will immediately let him rest! And that goes for you, too!" she said, wagging her finger at Remus sternly.

"But, of course!" Sirius grumbled, looking a little insulted, "Don't you trust me?" he said, pouting slightly.

Madam Pomphrey decided not to deign that with a response and left the room with one last eye roll.

The two bemused adults then turned their gazes to the smallest in the room.

Harry coughed nervously as those two gazes studied him carefully, "Erm... Hi?" Silence. "Ah... Um... did you want to sit? Yeah, you probably want to sit. You can sit here," Words just flew out of his mouth as he almost sprung out of his chair like a jack-in-a-box, only to be firmly pushed back into it by a large hand.

"No, that's fine. You sit," Sirius Black said, hand still on Harken's shoulder as he smiled down at him, flashing both rows of teeth at him. Harry could only think about how that smile sent shivers of the bad kind down his spine. He felt a **little** intimidated.

"Dad," Orion scolded his father lightly when he saw the deer-caught-in-the-headlights look on Harry's face and the Cheshire grin on Sirius' face.

"I'm not doing anything wrong," Sirius pouted at him when he caught the tone in his son's voice, "I just wanted to know who this midget is," he defended.

But despite his words, Harry was starting to feel **very** intimidated as the large hand held him in his spot... that is until he realised what Sirius had said.

"...What was that you called me, you big lummox that can block the sun with his overgrown head?" Harken said under his breath, smiling back at him even as his teeth began to grind against each other.

Sirius frowned at him slightly, "What did you just say?" he asked, only just barely catching the low words.

"Now, now, Sirius," Remus placated though it was obvious he was fighting down his laughter. The look on his face quickly sobered however, "What I want to know is why you're here," he said, giving Harry a pointed look.

The first-year threw his arms in the air, "Sheesh, why does everyone find it hard to believe that I came to visit a friend? And, before you ask, **yes, **I know he's werewolf," Harry replied, seeing the suspicion in his eyes.

"And you're in no way... _concerned_ for your safety?" Remus asked the small boy a little disbelievingly.

"About what?" Harry smiled at him, "That you have a furry-little-problem once a month?" Sirius snorted but quickly shut up at the look Remus shot him.

"How do we know we can trust you?" Sirius asked him curiously and, to Harken's sadness, a hint of caution. Hopefully, that would all change soon.

A serious expression crossed his face as Harry carefully weighed the pros and cons of the ways he could answer that question before eventually coming to a decision. He turned wide, innocent green eyes on the two adults and said simply, "Because Snape's a greasy git?"

"Welcome to the family!" Sirius immediately bellowed, beaming happily at him, even going so far as to lean forward and hug him. Harry returned the hug with equal gusto.

"Sirius!" Remus reprimanded though they could all see the twitch at the side of his mouth where a smile was threatening to break and the lightening of his eyes.

"What?" Sirius pouted at his mate, "He'd fit right in! I'm sure of it!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "That's not what I'm concerned about. I'm not sure how Severus' state of hygiene has anything to do with what we were talking about," he said dryly, "Just because he's your most favourite person of the moment doesn't mean we can trust him."

Orion frowned at his parents, "We can trust him," he stubbornly said.

Remus blinked at him, struck by the unusual loyalty his son had towards what was virtually a stranger. Out of the three of them, Orion was actually the least likely to trust anyone and Remus was sad to say that part of that might have been his fault. He needed to prepare Orion for the harsh reality that was the wizarding world's prejudices lest he learn the hard... "Still, I don't think-"

"I don't care."

Remus stared at the small raven-haired that had interrupted him with a frown, "What are you-"

He stopped himself however when the boy suddenly sat up straighter and practically glared at them. "I said **I don't care! **You can say what you want but nothing you say will separate us because Orion's my bestest friend and there's nothing you can do about it, so **there!**" Harry huffed agitatedly at the older werewolf, nearly shouting towards the end.

The three others just gaped at him in stunned silence.

-

With a gasp, Neville stumbled onto the grassy field, his legs finally giving out beneath him as the group of dragon tamers flew forward to restrain the Hungarian Ridgeback, the golden egg wrapped tightly within the folds of his arms. A large hand reached down and hauled him back up as Madam Pomphrey bustled him into a tent to look at the ugly burn on his shoulder.

"Yeh did it, Neville! Yeh did it! An' agains' the Horntail an' all, an' yeh know Charlie said that was the wors'," Hagrid cheered, giving the brunette's back a hard thump that almost sent him back sprawling across the ground, "Though, didya hafta hurt her so much...?"

Neville decided it was probably wise that he didn't answer, lest he lose another friend. Speaking of which... he turned to look at the two people running towards him – Hermione, followed closely by Ron.

"Neville, you were brilliant!" Hermione squeaked at him, eyes shining brightly at him as she gave him a big hug, careful of his injury as she did so.

Ron however was as pale as a ghost and stared at him uncertainly, fidgeting badly as he opened his mouth to speak, "Neville," he began very seriously, "I- I reckon someone else put your name in the goblet and is trying to do you in!" he shouted and then made a face as if annoyed at himself.

Neville knew he was trying to apologise and suddenly, he found he didn't need to hear it. He was just glad to get his best friend back, "It's okay," he said, before Ron could get the words out, "Forget it."

"No," Ron started, "I should've-"

"Forget it," Neville cut in and gave his friend a small smile. One that Ron all too eagerly returned.

The three of them made their way out of the tent and back towards the crowd as Ron gestured wildly, doing a remarkable impression of Hermione-fast-speak beside him, "You were the best, you know," he said, "No competition. I've never even heard of that spell, mate. Where did you learn it? Hermione?"

At that, Neville's eyes immediately began searching the crowd. Hermione gave him another one of her knowing looks (which he, of course, ignored) before nudging him lightly and pointed somewhere to his left. Neville turned and immediately spotted the messy black-haired head he had been looking for. As if he felt someone looking at him, Harken turned too, his emerald eyes locking onto Neville's soft brown ones. Seeing who it was, Harry grinned at him, lifting both his hands to give Neville two thumbs up.

Neville happily beamed back at him.

Ron, who had also turned to see what had caught his best friends' attention, groaned, "Oh, don't tell me you've made nice with that little snot."

Neville frowned at the red-head but said nothing, not yet willing to risk their only just recently patched up friendship. Hermione, on the other hand, had no qualms, "Ronald Bilius Weasley!" she hissed, whacking him on the shoulder none to lightly causing the boy to wince, "You will not talk about Harken like that again! He's a really nice boy and if anything, **you** have a lot to learn from **him**!"

Ron opened his mouth to argue but he didn't get a chance as shouts of surprise interrupted him and there came a loud cry for Madam Pomphrey. The reunited Goldren Trio spun around as one to face the disturbance and terror suddenly filled Neville for within the centre of the disturbance was none other than one Harken Skywalker laying in the arms of his friends.

Eyes closed and unconscious.

-

One moment he was talking to Orion and then the next he found himself face to face with widely grinning Fate and not for the first time, he wondered what he had done in his past-life to deserve this. Maybe he killed the Pope. Or invented karaoke machines. Timeless, classic songs wrecked by tuneless, howling drunks. He shuddered when unbidden images of Ron sprang up in his mind; they'd not only gotten burst ear-drums but had to claw their eyes out lest their brains exploded.

"Ha-rry~" Fate practically giggled as he sidled up to him.

Suddenly, the raven-haired boy knew **exactly** what the immortal wanted, "**No**," Harry growled.

"Aw, but Harry-!" Fate pouted.

"No!" Harry shouted this time but was thoroughly ignored.

"He _wuvs _you!"

Harry's face heated up, "No," he repeated stubbornly.

"But you know, it could have been a lot worse," Fate piped up.

Harry really couldn't see how that would be possible.

"I mean," Fate continued, "Retse could have gone along with J.K. and have you marry Ginny and spawn many bouncing babies together."

Harry stared at him horror-struck. He didn't know who J.K. was but MERLIN! Anyone but **Ginny**! Hadn't he suffered enough?!

"But that's fine anyway," Fate suddenly spoke up, smiling innocently, making Harry promptly eye him in suspicion, "I didn't want you to give him a chance anyway; it was Retse's idea to begin with. **My **plan as to who you should be with completely clashed with this so it all works out-"

"Ah-ha-HA~!" Harry suddenly sprang up, pointing at Fate with a triumphant grin on his face as he rambled, "Who said I wasn't going to give him a chance? **In fact**," he had an epiphany, "I think I'll ask him to the Ball! **Ha-ha**! What do you say about **that**?! I win!" he laughed one last time before he reached up and pinched himself sharply to wake himself up.

-

Harry blinked, sitting up gingerly. Looking around, he caught his reflection in a mirror and said seriously, "You're an idiot."

From wherever he was, Fate happily patted himself on the back.

* * *

**Final Note. **Hope it was up to your expectations :) And as usual, tell me what you think!


	6. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

Warnings: Slight slashy undertones, warnings of the usual unbetadness, screwed up personalities (I like to experiment :O) and plotholes the size of Uranus (yes, I'm lame like that... live with it :P)

**Note 1. Many Loving Thanks to PsychoWing, Erroneously, Jesseka89, Sabishii Kage Tenshi, Reginald Kennedy, momocolady, Zula F., getaiyou, MomoTessen, Shadow Eclipse, Sakina-chan, anonymous, BloodyRoseSharpThorn, Saturnblue, RobinIsley, Guardian Dimension, PirateCaptainBo, Kai Minomono, hentai18ancilla, MoonlitxPursuit, puretsubasa, hollyivy7, anakin potter evan and Adel Mortescyche. You are the Light at the end of my Tunnel :D**

(I actually got off my backside and replied properly this time... yey?)

**Note 2.** the last bit turned out a little... weird... am still scratching my head on what the hell had happened...

**Note 3.** I finally figured out what to do with Snape! ...well, sorta... he'll be in the next chapter :) well, hopefully... maybe... -facepalm-

**Note 4. **it took me a while to decide on Draco Malfoy's persona and... this is what I ended up with... o.O

**Note 5.** ...I'm running out of ideas...

**Note 6.** Word Count: 3478 (way less than last time but it seemed like the right place to finish...)

* * *

**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 5.**

Harry blinked, sitting up gingerly. Looking around, he caught his reflection in a mirror and said seriously, "You're an idiot."

From wherever he was, Fate happily patted himself on the back.

And Harry just **knew** he was too, because he'd somehow once again let the immortal con him into doing something he didn't want to do.

...well, he sort of wanted to befriend Orion anyway but he certainly did **not** want to come this bloody place for his well-deserved 'vacation' and he certainly did **not** want to ask Neville to the ball!

...

...

...

...he **didn't**!

"Stop looking at me that way!" he pointed an accusing finger at his reflection.

"Well, it seems you've awakened on your own and are feeling much better now," a female voice said. Harry turned to the doorway. His cheeks flushed slightly in embarrassment as he slowly lowered his right arm at Madam Pomphrey's raised eyebrow.

He cleared his throat, "Yeah, I guess I have..." he said, glad she decided not to bring up the issue of his lacking sanity.

"You seem completely healthy; nothing in the analysis showed anything wrong with you that might have caused you to faint but according to your friends, this isn't the first time this has happened?" Madam Pomphrey asked getting right to the point, occasionally flicking her wand at him.

Harry nodded.

"And you have no idea what may have caused this?"

Harry shook his head in denial, carefully schooling his face to one of slight confusion. _I know __**exactly**__ why I fainted!_ He raged on the inside, but to tell her that he fainted because an annoying immortal known as Fate wanted to have a chat with him... He doubted he'd see anything but the inside of a padded cell for a **very** long time.

The upside to that though would be that'd leave Fate without any entertainment either. Huh. Decisions, decisions...

"Well, just to be certain, you'll be staying for another night at least to monitor you in case I've missed anything."

Harken sat up at that; had the reason Fate made him faint randomly finally come forth? That bastard knew how much he hated staying in the Hospital Wing!

_I'm going to -censored- -censored- you -censored- Fate! _He thought angrily.

Outwardly, however, he was a picture of angelicalness (halo and all), "What?" Harry spoke up serenely, "But did you not say I'm completely healthy? **Surely**," and this was said in absolute calm of course (that noise isn't **really** the sound of his teeth grinding against each other...), "Surely, I can return to my dorm where I will be under the watchful but tender care of my classmates?"

She completely ignored him and proceeded to tuck him in so tightly as if that alone could prevent him from escaping. Giving him one last stern look that clearly said 'sleep, or else', she left the room believing that the blankets would keep him in place and thus he would be forced to comply with her order.

_Ha-hah!_ Harry thought smugly, _And this is where I make my cunning escape. She's clearly overestimated the ability of this infernal blanket and __**underestimated**__ mine!_

And with that, he began wiggling the wiggle he'd perfected over the years for escaping Hospital beds. He wiggled this way, then he wiggled that way, struggling with the white sheet that held him in place.

..._ok_, Harry grudgingly conceded, _this might take a __**little**__ longer than I had planned._

-

The scene in the library had become a familiar one. Cedric and Orion sitting at the same table, calmly studying. The air between them had, however, become tense and uncomfortable, more so without Harken to act as a sort of buffer. Cedric was confused at this. It wasn't the first time they had to study together without Harken and they'd long gotten over the initial awkwardness of their friendship. So, why were they so tense now?

Orion, on the other hand, knew **exactly** why he felt so uncomfortable but he wasn't about to reveal the reason to the blonde any time soon.

It was hard enough as it was to stamp down the blush that threatened to erupt on his face.

So poor Cedric had been forced to throw the black-haired teen furtive looks out of the corner of his eye, wondering whether it was because their mutual friend was in the Hospital Wing and they weren't allowed to visit him yet or whether it was actually something **he **had done.

After what seemed like the millionth glance in his direction, Orion finally had enough, "Couldn't you go and bother somebody else? I'm sure your fanclub is looking for you..." he said, wincing when that came out a little more bitterly than he had planned.

Cedric's blonde head bolted up, surprised at being addressed. Orion stringently glared at the bookshelf behind Cedric's head. So what he couldn't look the blonde in the eyes? It didn't mean anything...

"What?"

Orion rolled his eyes, "Don't you have friends you can go annoy?" he dead-panned.

An almost wistful smile lit Cedric's face, "'Course I do," he said, "I have you don't I?"

"Who said I'm your friend?" Orion grumbled under his breath.

But the blonde caught every word and stared at him pensively.

Orion blinked at the serious look the other adopted that was very much unlike his usual cheerful self.

"We... aren't friends?" Cedric asked sadly as he leaned in closer, looking into the other's eyes for a sign of **anything**. And it was a good thing he was looking so closely; if he hadn't he would have missed the slight widening of Orion's eyes in surprise and the tinge on pink on his cheeks before the teen ducked his head, his black hair falling in front of his face.

Cedric clung on to that expression as his new shining ray of hope, feeling every bit of his usual happy self again as he went back to tackling his school books with his usual fervour.

"Well, look what we have here," a voice remarked snidely.

Cedric frowned as Orion tensed immediately, fists clenched in front of him as soon as he heard the voice. He turned slightly to look at the one who had disturbed their time together. "What do you want Potter?"

"Don't delude yourself Black," Potter sneered at Orion, completely ignoring the Hufflepuff, "He only wants to find a way he can play Quidditch without getting thrashed by me like last year. He's only being friendly with **you** because you're the only loser in our house who would give him everything just to be seen with him."

If this had been an anime, this would have been the point when Cedric's eyes would burst into fire out of hot, righteous **anger**. Or maybe his system would have overloaded and the mantra, _**Kill, Kill, Kill**_, would have run through his head repeatedly until he gave into it. But it isn't, thus instead Cedric fumed with righteous indignity thinking, _Bastard! How dare you! _as he made to stand to take down that precocious little brat a few notches, anger written all over his face when a hand darted out and clamped onto his right arm.

Grey eyes dropped down to look at that hand before Cedric's gaze trailed up the arm before landing on the eye's of its owner. And when questioned later by Harken about what had happened, the blonde would embarrassingly explain that he couldn't really remember what had happened next. Because at this point, he had died...

And gone to _**Heaven**_.

_He's touching my arm! _Cedric giggled to himself. Suddenly, the room was filled with a million beautiful flowers and the ceiling opened up to the clear, blue sky.

In reality, Orion stared bewilderedly at the happy, dazed look the blonde was aiming in his direction. He slowly retracted his arm.

No change.

Orion's eye twitched and decided to address a more pressing matter than the anomaly that was Cedric Diggory's mind.

"The world doesn't revolve around you, Potter," he drawled, "It's about time you grew up and saw that."

"You're nothing but a freak!" Barry suddenly spat, his face reddening and his anger building a lot more faster than Orion had predicted, "A worthless piece of shit! No one really wants you! Not like-"

But he never got to finish because something chose that moment to fly through the air and smack Barry soundly the head, "Ow!" he moaned spinning around to growl at his assailant.

Cedric blinked as he snapped out of his trance, bending down to pick up the offending object, studied it and then also turned towards the assailant, "Harry," he said, fighting the grin threatening to break onto his face, "Did you just throw your **shoe** at Potter's head?"

"Irma would have killed me if I'd thrown a book," Harry said completely straight-faced as if that explained everything. He then gave someone behind them a thumbs up.

"Irma?" Orion questioned quietly as he turned to look behind in time to see Madam Pince the librarian shockingly nod at Harken approvingly and returning his thumbs up equally straight-faced.

Barry glared at Harken angrily, "I'm going to make you pay for that you little brat..."

"No, you won't," Cedric suddenly interrupted, bolting up from his chair.

"What was that Diggory?" Barry snarled, turning his glare on the blonde.

Cedric didn't flinch, rather returning it with equal force, "I said, no you won't. You won't attack another student unless you want to find yourself doing detention with **Filch**," he said, flashing his prefect's badge.

"He threw a shoe at me!" Barry fumed.

"Prove it," Cedric said, raising an uninterested eyebrow at him.

"Prove-?! **You saw-!**"

"No, I didn't." Three males gaped openly at Cedric. Did friendly, honest, prefect Cedric just... **lie**?

"Then how do you explain that?!" Barry snapped as he pointed at Harken's feet.

Cedric glanced at Harken's shoed left foot, his socked right foot (that wiggled at him) minus shoe, to the said missing shoe in his right hand and then back at Barry's scowling face and simply shrugged, "Harken was passing his shoe to me; it's not his fault your face got in the way."

_That totally doesn't make any sense! _Orion and Harken screamed in their minds.

"You-!"

"I suggest you refrain from finishing that sentence, Potter," Hermione Granger appeared, stepping up to them with Neville and Ron closely behind her. She frowned at her Barry, "And that you leave now or I'll write a letter to your mother about what you did last Tuesday," she huffed, chin jutting out slightly as she somehow managed to stare him down despite him being a head taller than her.

Barry's eyes darkened but he said nothing as he spun around and stalked out of the library.

"Blimey, you're amazing sometimes Hermione..." Ron finally blurted out in the ensuing silence.

"Only sometimes?"

As the two bantered, Harry glanced at Orion. The other dark-haired teen was staring at the library entrance, emotions flickering across his face too fast for Harry to catch. Despite that, he knew exactly what the teen was thinking. Harry might have cut Barry off before he could finish but both knew all to well what the antagonistic teen was about to reveal.

"_No one really wants you. __**Not like I do**__."_

It seemed despite all his efforts, things had gotten a little more complicated.

He didn't get a chance to contemplate this when two hands spun him around and Harry suddenly found his vision and various other senses assaulted by bushy hair.

**Lots of it**.

"Oh, I'm so glad you're okay! You are okay, right? Of course, you're okay. Otherwise Madam Pomphrey wouldn't have let you out. Did she tell you what happened? We wanted to come see you but she wouldn't let us, saying you had to rest. Oh, we were so worried!" Hermione rambled.

Harry awkwardly patted her on the back, "Madam Pomphrey said there was nothing wrong with me. Thanks for caring," he gasped as he attempted to escape her grasp (and not choke on the hair that he was being assaulted with).

"Hermione you might want to let go... He needs to breathe..." Neville said weakly, seeing the futility of Harry's struggles.

"Oh, right," she said letting go as Harry gasped for air. She gave him a searching look, "So Madam Pomphrey doesn't know what made you faint like that? And the other times as well?"

Harry shook his head in denial while, inside, he repeated his earlier mantra of curses towards a certain immortal with some intriguing new additions (that cannot be mentioned here in the interest of remain within the story rating...).

"Have you ever considered that you may be narcoleptic, Harken?"

Harry blinked at her in surprise.

"Narcoleptic?" Cedric looked at Hermione in confusion.

The bushy-haired fourth year nodded sagely, "According to Wikipedia, narcolepsy is a chronic sleep disorder characterised by overwhelming daytime drowsiness and sudden attacks of sleep. Not that one of my intellect would use Wikipedia, mind you. But Retse does so..." she shrugged. She would let Retse off the mark this time; not everyone could be as book-smart as Hermione was.

"Wikipedia?" Cedric questioned again.

"Retse?" Neville echoed with equal confusion.

"Anyway," Harry coughed, "getting back to the story at hand ("Story?" Cedric spoke up again, getting more and more confused), I don't know about that... Wouldn't Madam Pomphrey have noticed something?"

Hermione shook her head, "Diagnosis is relatively easy when all the symptoms of narcolepsy are present, but if the sleep attacks are isolated and cataplexy is mild or absent, diagnosis is more difficult," she explained but seeing their blank looks she added, "Plus to test for it, she would have needed to continuously record his sleep brain waves which she wouldn't have done when she found nothing wrong with his brain in the first place." That they understood.

"Well, then let's go," she said and proceeded to drag Harry behind her.

That is, until Harry's other mother hen- er... I mean friend stepped in front of her with a frown, "Where are you taking him?" Orion asked, casting a disapproving glance at the tight grip on Harken's arm.

"Back to Hospital Wing, of course! We need to be certain if narcolepsy is what he has! And if he does, we've got to get him the right treatment straight away! We were lucky that so far, he'd only fallen asleep when the only danger was hitting the floor but what if it happens in Potions? And he fell into his boiling cauldron! Or if he were in the middle of duel! Think of all the things that could happen to him if we don't do something right now!"

"I'm fine!" Harry argued feebly.

"No, you're not. And she's right," Orion said, suitably convinced Harry's well-being was under-threat as he grabbed Harry's free hand and helped Hermione drag him towards the Hospital Wing.

Seeing resistance was futile in that department, Harry turned pleading, puppy dog eyes on the three boys following behind them.

Cedric and Neville both crumbled instantly at the look and made to help him but as soon as they got close, Orion and Hermione simultaneously turned on them and **hissed**. They fell back immediately, metaphoric tails between their legs as they sent Harry apologetic looks.

If Harry still had possession of one of his hands, he would have face-palmed. Instead he flailed some more.

Unfortunately, that road was a total **fail.** _Sob._

"I don't know why we have to do this," Ron grumbled darkly, not understanding why they had to help that brat, "Can't we just let Black take him?" he whined.

Hermione whirled on him.

If he wasn't in this situation, Harry would have laughed at how Ron's face paled instantly at the look on Hermione's face.

"Blimey, I-" the red-head rushed ahead of them, "what I meant was, **get out of the way! We need to get to the Hospital Wing!**" he shouted, scaring off some poor first years by waving his sparking wand at them.

"Really, I'm fine!" Harry argued again, this time miraculously managing to release himself of the Granger-Black combo and skipped out of their grasp. He turned to look at them and waved his arms in the air, "See? I'm fine!"

...is what he would have said if he wasn't suddenly hit with a strange sensation and all his muscles ceased to function. He could feel himself falling-

"Harken!"

-right into the arms of one Draco Malfoy. His senses returned in an instant; _DAMN YOU, FATE!_

The blonde bastard then had the nerve to leer at him, "I hadn't expected you to fall for me this easily."

The muscles around Harry's jaw weakened again as he gaped at the Slytherin; _Did __**Malfoy**__ just use a cheesy pick-up line?_

Behind them, the four Gryffindors and one Hufflepuff stared at them in abject horror.

Having summarily stupefied Harry's watchers, Malfoy smirked at them and then, to Harry's chagrin, flung the smaller boy over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and ran off in the opposite direction.

"Hey!" they shouted indignantly when they finally came out of their shocked stupor and realised the situation at hand.

"Where are you taking me?!" Harry squealed, though he would later deny having made such an unmanly sound.

"Hospital Wing," Draco replied simply.

Harken's brain exploded, "**What!** Why?!"

"Because I asked him to."

Harry blanched as he was planted firmly back onto the ground, right in front of his greatest arch nemesis. No, not Voldemort.

"Madam Pomphrey," Harry said calmly though his voice was slightly high-pitched.

"Mister Skywalker," the dictator-in-nurse's-clothing said, giving one of her stern looks as she loomed over him like a... looming... thing... A bead of perspiration slid down his nape but he held his ground, refusing to back down. Refusing to beg for mercy. He may only be eleven but he had his **pride**, damn it!

"Mister Skywalker," she repeated for added ominousness that would have clearly brought a normal human down to their knees but not Harry! No, he remained unbudging.

"**Mister** **Skywalker**," she said again (Harry's knees shook a little this time but he remained standing), "I don't believe I gave you permission to leave the Hospital Wing."

Silence.

"**What?! You weren't given permission to leave the Hospital Wing?!**" both Hermione and Orion shouted.

_Okay_, Harry thought, _**now**__ might be the time to throw my pride away and start begging for mercy..._

He gulped as the three began to converge on him like vultures on their prey, releasing waves of suffocating killer intent.

Was this the end of our dashing Hero?

_Farewell cruel world_, Harry thought morbidly as his back thumped lightly against the wall he had backed into.

Then he had a sudden epiphany of sorts. Walls weren't usually warm to the touch, especially the stone ones at Hogwarts. _And they most certainly don't have arms!_ He thought as a pair of arms draped carelessly over his shoulder.

_Malfoy!_

"Now, now," the blonde said as he gave the three vultures a disarming smile that amazingly froze them in their tracks, "There's no need to be violent. Surely you can find it in your hearts for such a cute, little thing," he smiled widely, pinching the cheeks of Harry's disgruntled pouting face.

And it was only because of the shock of seeing the faces of anger morph into ones of confusion and slight disorientation, that Harry forgot to stomp Malfoy in the groin for calling him **little**.

_It actually worked_, Harry gaped instead.

Draco tilted his head, chuckling softly at the flabbergasted look on Harry's face. Tightening his arms around Harry, he pressed the smaller boy closer to his chest, "Of course it worked," the blonde whispered smugly into Harry's right ear.

Harry shivered unconsciously.

Suddenly the killing intent was back. Draco glanced up, his eyes falling upon the heavily glowering Neville Longbottom as the new source of the pressure.

The Slytherin smirked back at him as he hugged his small Hufflepuff captive closer...

...and then licked Harry's cheek.

And immediately, Neville wasn't the only one glaring at him anymore.

-

"So..." Harry finally spoke up a little while later, having given up trying to escape the confines of his bed for the moment. He gave the occupant of the next bed over a stony look mixed with a hint of sympathy.

Draco chuckled, "My, they certainly reacted strongly."

_Understatement!!!_ Harry screamed in his mind as he eyed the blonde's full body cast, his two black eyes, busted lip and the strange burning shrine that had been constructed at the foot of his bed. Green eyes narrowed suspiciously, _Is that a skull...?_

Malfoy smirked at him, "Fufufu... There's no need to cry for me, little one."

"Who's crying for you, you creep!"

* * *

**Final note. **As usual, please tell me what you think! :D


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you. In particular, anything you recognise is most possibly an extract from the fourth book, _Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire_.

Long Summary: After the fall of Voldemort, twenty-three year old Harry Potter is gearing up for some major downtime. However, being Fate's favourite toy, things rarely go as planned. And so, instead of finding himself relaxing on the beaches of wherever, he's trying his best to fade into the background, in another dimension and eleven. Oh, woe is him. And to complicate things, Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived, Voldemort is alive and laying low (but not for long) and his counterpart is a spoilt brat that even his parents cannot control. While content at first to just sit in the background, Harry soon finds himself getting ready for war once more. Why? Read and find out!

Warnings: Slight slashy undertones, warnings of the usual unbetadness, screwed up personalities, characters with PMS and MPD (possibly at the same time), tooth-decaying clichés, OOC characters out of character of their OOCness but still not in character (I'm not particularly good at being consistent...) and finally plotholes the size of Uranus (yes, I'm lame like that... live with it :P) and anime-esqueness (because I seriously watch too much of it...)

**Also emphasis on warning of occasional blatant self-insertion (though it's usually only a line or so long). I've had a few complaints about this but I'm sorry to say that this stuff is going to stay. Mainly because I'm writing this fic as more of a gag-story (kind of like my parody one) so I'm not really taking myself seriously and it's just the weird way I tend to write when I don't take myself seriously... Sorry if that offends anyone o_O haha...**

**Note 1. **Many loving thanks and kisses and flowers and chocolates and teddy bears and Sony PS3s and IPods and Plasma TVs to my wonderful reviewers! :D (...what's with the strange looks? Did I say something weird again?)

**Note 2.** Sorry about the delay peeps... My laptop totally busted on me taking my notes with it D: (which led to much moping around the house in a depressed fashion) Thankfully, I had a backup copy but it was pretty outdated so there's still a lot of stuff that I've forgotten...

**Note 3.** Which brings me to my next point... Snape T_T what the hell do I do with him again? D: Omg, he's never going to make an appearance at this rate...

**Note 4. **BTW, **gasp!** Is that a hint of plot I see in the horizon? Shock horror!

**Note 5.** More craziness... Introducing a new but familiar face and GOD, am I on drugs...? Oh, well, remember! None of this is supposed to make sense anyway! XD

**Note 6.** To make up for the abysmally short previous chapter, this one is 6554 words which is almost twice as much :D

* * *

**Fate's Favourite Toy**

**Chapter 6.**

Harry easily noted the scrape of a chair to his left and the sound of someone sliding into it but didn't look up from his Potions homework. "Hey, Cedric," he mumbled in greeting instead, knowing it was the blonde because the Gryffindor fourth years had Transfiguration. His brow furrowed slightly as he carefully recounted the properties of the Leucanthemum and its uses in potions from the top of his head, the soft scratches of his quill almost echoing in the quiet of the library.

And it was only minutes later did he realise the **wrongness** of that statement: **Cedric had not said a single word**.

Warily, Harry raised his emerald eyes to peek at his silent friend. "Er..." he began uncertainly, "Cedric... are you alright?"

The blonde before him sat stock-still, face startling pale, eyes unblinking focus straight ahead with his hands fisted tightly in front of him. At the sound of Harry's voice, Cedric's head turned slowly towards him, the rest of his body remaining strangely still. They stared at each for a moment before the blonde's mouth finally fell open... but no sound came out.

Harry gulped slightly as the older Hufflepuff continued to stare at him, mouth hanging wide open and as pale as a ghost. To be honest, he was a little creeped out...

Cedric's mouth twitched and soft sound came out, so soft that Harry would have missed it if he library hadn't be as quiet as it was. Giving the blonde one last critical look (to check for any signs of something potentially contagious), Harry leaned in closer, "Say that again...?"

A huff of warm air hit his cheek as Cedric's mouth twitched again and this time, the first year was close enough to catch what the blonde was trying to say:

"_Help me..._"

Emerald eyes blinked slowly as Harry processed that silent plea, "Um... Sure... What do you need help with?" he asked, leaning back into his chair.

This time Cedric's hand twitch and Harry realised there was a piece of paper poking out of one of the blonde's fists. Gently pulling it out the other's grip so as to not to tear it, Harry brought it closer to himself, smoothing out the crinkled bit of paper with his right hand. He grimaced when he realised what it was. Truthfully, he'd been trying to forget it; The Yule Ball.

But... that still didn't explain the expression on Cedric's face. Harry glanced up, jumping back in surprise when he realised how **close **the blonde had gotten but before he could retreat to a safe distance from the clearly unstable Hufflepuff, two hands clamp onto his arms just below his shoulders and pulled him closer.

"_**Help me...**_" Cedric rasped.

Harry looked around nervously, wishing there was someone to help him too, "Um..."

"Help me..." Cedric repeated in a louder voice as he started to shake the first year, "**You've got to help me, Harry!**" he cried desperately, shaking Harry a bit more before he practically buried his head in Harry's shirt with a muffled sob.

Harry awkwardly patted him on the back (well, it was more Cedric's side as the top half of Harry's arms were being held captive by the distraught Hufflepuff), "Cedric, I'll help in anyway I can but you need to tell me what the problem is..."

Silence.

"...what if he says no?" the blonde mumbled into Harry's shirt.

Harry blinked in confusion, "...what?"

"**What if Orion says no?!**" he started to shake Harry again.

The raven-haired teen groaned inwardly, _that was all this was about?! He was worried Orion wouldn't want to go to the Ball with him?!_

"What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?" Cedric shook Harry some more.

Harry gave his friend a dry look and wondered if Voldemort had actually done the world a favour when he had offed Diggory in his world.

But before Harry could contemplate inflicting some violence himself, a familiar but unwelcome voice spoke up, "God, Diggory, and **you** were chosen to be our Champion? What does that make the rest of the sixth years? **Flobberworms**?" said one Draco Malfoy who had made a miraculous recovery so the author could mess with Harry some more. (_She didn't even try to cover that up!_ Harry thought incredulously.)

Back in reality, "Malfoy," Harry scolded, though he didn't expect the blonde to back down.

So it was to his amazement when Draco sighed, sneer slipping off his face as he flopped gracefully into the chair on the other side of Harry, opposite the despondent Cedric Diggory.

"The things I do for you..." the blonde actually pouted, chin resting on one hand as he leant forward on the table, towards Harry. "And not a single thank you."

The first year eyed the Slytherin warily (_Are those __**tears**__ in his eyes?_ Harry thought disbelievingly), tilting away from him as far as possible without falling off his chair, "Er... Thank you...?" Harry smiled weakly, _**what the **__**hell**__** was **__**wrong**__** with this Malfoy?!**_

And to his further bafflement, Draco's face lit up like a Christmas tree, "Anything for you, fufufu~" he chuckled. Harry shivered; _**and what the **__**hell**__** was with that 'laugh'?!**_

Malfoy smiled, "Ah~ So cute..." And then suddenly the blonde's face was very, **very** close, "I could just eat you up right here..." he whispered. Harry blanched.

It was then Cedric finally snapped out of his Orion-induced-depression, knocked out of his daze by his internal Harry-in-trouble alarm. He lifted his head off the table and looked around in confusion, having blocked out the outside world for the past five minutes as he was want to do in matters concerning a certain black-haired Gryffindor.

"Malfoy? When did you get here?"

The younger blonde froze, mere centimetres from Harry's face, glanced at the naïve Hufflepuff in annoyance before slowing drawing back into his seat with a loud huff.

_I take back everything I've thought or said!_ Harry shouted mentally, _**Long live, Cedric Diggory!**_

The aforementioned blonde looked utterly confused at the starry-eyed, hero-worshipper gaze his friend was suddenly giving him (though it undeniably pleased him as well) as he wondered what he had done. And seeing as Harry was otherwise occupied, Cedric could only turn to Malfoy for an answer.

The Slytherin gave him an Arctic smile.

Or maybe not.

"So, uh..." Cedric said nervously, racking his brain for something to talk about, "You going to the Yule Ball, Malfoy?"

This time the Slytherin gave him a "Are you stupid?" look.

"Ah, right, of course you are," Cedric coughed, "You have someone in mind yet?"

A nod.

"Parkinson?"

Draco gave him a disgruntled look, "That's disgusting. She's like my sister."

Harry looked at him in surprise; but in his world...

"Greengrass?" Cedric hazarded another guess.

An eye-roll in response.

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion, "So who are you taking?" he finally blurted out, his blasted curiosity getting the better of him.

And, of course, he immediately regretted it when Malfoy actually leered at him and said, "Why, **you** of course!"

"**WHAT?!**"

-

"The Yule Ball is approaching," said Professor McGonagall when she got her class' full attention, "A traditional part of the Triwizard Tournament, it is an opportunity for us to socialise with our foreign guests. Now, the ball will be open only to fourth-years and above although you may invite a younger student if you wish..."

The transfiguration continued to talk, for once seemingly tolerating the increasing volume of whispers and giggling from the girls, but Neville didn't register any of that.

No, his attention was firmly planting on the dark spot engraved into his wooden desk.

Unfortunately, he couldn't block sensation of Hermione's eyes boring into the side of his head as soon as the woman had uttered the words "younger student."

The bell rang and Neville thanked the stars as he haphazardly flung his belongings into his bag, throwing it over his shoulder as he made to bolt out the door before Hermione got a chance to corner him.

But, alas, this was not to be so.

"Longbottom," Professor McGonagall called above the noise, "A word if you please."

Neville cursed mentally as he shuffled forward begrudgingly. He risked a glance at the only door out of the room. Hermione's unholy eyes glinted back at him. Neville shivered.

"Longbottom, the champions and their partners-"

"Partners?" Neville squeaked. There was no way out of this way there...?

Professor McGonagall looked at him a little worried. Neville supposed he must've seemed very pale all of a sudden.

"Your partners for the Yule Ball, Longbottom," she said slowly, "Your **dance** partners."

A hand shot out from behind him and clamped tightly onto his shoulder, willing him to be silent. Neville could feel cold sweat clinging to the back of his neck; _what had he done to deserve this...?_

"Professor," Hermione began in a deceptively sweet and respectful tone, "Neville already has someone in mind. Harken Skywalker."

Professor McGonagall raised an eyebrow, "If you wish to invite a male friend from a younger year, might I suggest you invite him yourself, Miss Granger?"

"Oh, no!" Hermione shook her head, looking a picture of angelic innocence... "You see, Neville really likes him. **A lot**." ...while actually being the very embodiment of evil itself.

Professor McGonagall's composure actually broke a little as she blinked at them in surprise, "Oh? I hadn't realised, Longbottom, that you..." the Transfiguration professor actually seemed lost for words, trailing off uncertainly.

"It's a recent development," Hermione piped in happily when it became obvious she wasn't going to finish her sentence.

"I see... Well," Professor McGonagall regained her composure, "If that is the case, then I see no reason to disagree. Homosexuality, of course, happens to be conveniently widely accepted in the wizarding world and there are no rules that suggest you cannot bring a partner of the same sex. Either way, you are to open the Ball with your partner as per tradition. Do not be late," she finished with a stern look in Neville's direction.

However, the brunette was far to traumatised to respond, _**Why...**_he thought to himself with building disbelief,_** why the **__**hell**__** are we discussing my sexual orientation with **__**McGonagall**__**?! WHYYYYYY?!**_

So Hermione did it for him with a gleeful smile, "Understood, Professor."

-

Two days later and Neville wasn't any closer to asking Harken to the Ball than to begin with. It wasn't that Neville didn't want ask Harken – no, actually he rather liked the idea dancing with the small Hufflepuff and... holding hands... (Neville's face reddened) But wanting and actually working up the nerve to ask the younger male were two completely different things. In that way, he supposed he was grateful for Hermione's silent support... as terrifying and nerve-wrecking as it could be at times.

However, there was one other obstacle that both he and Hermione had somehow completely overlooked...

The six of them (Harry, Neville, Orion, Cedric, Hermione and a reluctant Ron) were currently studying together in the library as they had come to do often in the past few months. Hermione had dragged Ron off into the maze of books a while ago to help her search for some books and was not expected to be back any time soon when one factored in Hermione and her love of books. Orion had disappeared into a different part of the library shortly after them and moments later Cedric had followed under the pretence of "working out the Triwizard Clue." The remaining two would have given him the benefit of the doubt if he hadn't cast them furtive looks and rushed off in Orion's direction, neck already reddening.

In any case, that left our dashing hero and his prospective partner... **all alone**. -wink- -wink-

Neville glanced at the Hufflepuff to his right, scribbling away on his parchment. As if sensing his gaze, the quill paused and emerald eyes turned to stare back at him. Harry smiled at him.

Neville smiled back happily, mind becoming entirely blank of whatever it was he was going to say.

"So, how are you going with that egg clue?" Harry spoke.

Neville blinked, breaking out of his daze, "Huh? ...oh! Yes, it's going... really good. I think I've got a pretty good idea what it is," he lied. His insides gave a bit of a guilty squirm. He didn't want to seem like an idiot... plus anyway, he had plenty of time to figure it out.

"Have you really?" Harry looked impressed and Neville's insides gave a happy squirm this time, "Well done!"

Neville smiled widely at the praise. _This is my chance!_ He thought, _This would be best time to ask him to the Ball!_ He edged his chair closer to Harry's.

"Harry, about the Ball..."

Emerald eyes sparkled up at him curiously.

"Would you-" Neville froze.

All of a sudden, it felt like something was stabbing him the side of the head. Turning slightly, he couldn't help but gulp slightly at the look on Orion Black's face. The black-haired Gryffindor's cold blue eyes glared at him, narrowing in warning at the distance between Neville and Harry.

Neville gulped again and edged his chair back... _Okay, maybe not the right time after all..._

Thankfully, if the pleased look on Orion's face was anything to go by, Neville had moved back to a suitable distance and was no longer in danger of being mauled by an over-protective mother- er... **sibling**-figure.

Cedric, seemingly completely oblivious to all this, plopped into the chair opposite the other two. And if the frustrated look on **his** face was anything to go by, he hadn't worked up the courage to ask Orion either.

And Harry, equally oblivious, went back to his parchment...

Or was he...?

Harry glared down at his parchment. He'd been deliberating asking Neville to the Ball for a while now. He'd eventually given into the fact that some part of him **did** want to ask the older boy but knew that realistically, the chances of getting a positive reply was low.

He recalled that curly-haired third-year Hufflepuff girl who had asked the tall brunette the day after the announcement. Neville had immediately said 'no' before he'd even stopped to consider the matter, leaving the girl to walk off looking rather hurt. The rest of the boys had teased the brunette for the rest of the day but Harry had wondered if a cute girl like that was rejected so quickly, what chance did he have? Not that Harry wanted Neville to have accepted that invitation but still... Maybe the brunette wanted to ask Cho Chang like he had in his fourth year...?

Harry shook his head vigorously; what the hell was he thinking? Since when had he fallen so low that he was left with only the realm of teenage angst? That wasn't like him at all! He was Gryffindor, damn it! (...ok, he was Hufflepuff now, but he **used** to be a Gryffindor and that's what counts!)

_Work hard, Harry!_ His inner!Gryffindor said with an emphatic thumbs up, _You can do it!_

**It was time to take action!**

"The Ball's in a couple of days, isn't it?"

Silent nods of affirmation.

Harry heaved an exaggerated sigh and turned his big, gorgeous, green eyes on Neville, "I really wish I could go too," he said, finishing with a cute pout.

The brunette took that all in full-blast, eyes fuzzy as he was knocked into a daze.

_Ask me, ask me, ask me, ask me_, Harry thought over and over again as he tried to mentally hammer it into Neville's head while he was in only a semi-conscious.

Neville's eyes suddenly cleared, this time brimming with Gryffindor CourageTM as he once again edged closer.

_It worked!_ Harry thought as he cackled maniacally.

"I'll take you," Orion suddenly spoke up.

...unfortunately, Neville had taken too long.

"**NOOOOOOOOOO...!!!**" Cedric screamed, hands fisted in his hair as he jumped out of his seat horrified.

Everyone in the library turned to stare at him.

"Sorry..." Cedric squeaked as he sheepishly lowered himself back into his chair. "Noooooo..." he repeated in a much softer voice but with the same amount of desperation.

"You're not serious, are you?" the blonde asked Orion hesitantly.

Harry vigorously stamped down the urge to say, "No, that's his father." Now was not the time for lame jokes.

"Well, why not?" Orion challenged, raising a single elegant eyebrow at the sixth year.

Cedric's face reddened as he opened and closed his mouth several times, not once did sound come out. Eventually, finding he response he could give, Cedric turned pleading eyes on Harry. _Help me..._

Harry rolled his eyes, "Because Cedric wants you to go to the Ball with **him**," he dead-panned.

_So blunt and honest!_ The three older students stared at him wide-eyed.

"So, anyway, since those two are going together, who are you going with Neville?" Harry asked.

_Don't make a decision like that so easily for us!_ Orion and Cedric thought incredulously. Though, to the blonde's great relief and eternal happiness, Orion made no move to refute it.

_I'm going the Ball with Orion... __**Orion's going with **__**me**__** to the Ball!**_

_**YES!!!**_Cedric cried mentally as a colossal mountain burst up from beneath him, his eyes sparkling as he proudly stuck the Hufflepuff banner on its peak.

Back in reality, "H-hey...! Stop t-that!" Orion grumbled in embarrassment as he tried to pry off the Hufflepuff that had glomped him, "What are you doing...?!" he hissed when Cedric started to endearingly rub his cheek against Orion's shoulder with a blissful look on his face.

"Um..." Neville decided that perhaps the best course of action was to ignore them (it wasn't like Cedric was doing anything... **illegal**, nor was Orion's attempts to free himself anything more than half-hearted). "I haven't actually asked anyone yet..." he answered Harry instead.

"You know..." Neville gulped as he edged even closer to Harry, _I can do this!_ This was his chance, what with Orion suitably distracted.

Harry waited patiently: _**ask me, ask me, ask me, ask me...**_

Neville did a very good impression of freaked-out!Cedric.

Harry sighed. Couldn't the author have made the males in this fanfic a little less shy...? ("What about Malf-?" Retse began but Harry was quick to cut her off, "**I don't even know where to ****begin**** with what's wrong with that guy!**" he shouted)

_Looks like I have no choice but to use Plan B_, Harry thought sombrely. It went against all his morals (and could backfire in a horrible, soul-sucking fashion) but he had no other option.

"I guess I should go with Malfoy after all."

Neville's eyes bulged, "**W-what?**"

"Well, he asked me to go with him a couple days ago but I didn't have a chance to say either yes or no to him yet," _Probably because I sucker-punched the creep and sent him back to the Hospital Wing but Neville doesn't need to know that... _"I'm not allowed to go without an older student so I guess I'll go with him since the Ball sounds amazing..." _That last bit... total lie but who's counting?_

"Malfoy?" Neville echoed weakly, "Are you sure you want to go with... **him**?"

"Why not?" Harry queried cutely, forcing out an aura of naivety and innocence.

It was then four powerful emotions made themselves known to the fourth-year Gryffindor, charging at him with all the subtlety of a herd of stampeding elephants.

First there was Protectiveness. Neville wouldn't put it past the Slytherin **pervert **take advantage of the innocent, little Hufflepuff in exchange for taking him to the Yule Ball.

Next there was Anger. It was just the sort of thing that Slytherin **bastard** would try to do, wasn't it? Trying to steal the affections of what was **his**.

This was followed by a bout of Jealously. **His Harry, HIS!**

And finally, Confusion. W-wait, wait, wait...! Since when had Harry become **his**?!

"**No! You can go with me!**" Neville finally blurted out.

"Okay~!" Harry beamed happily.

Neville blinked; that was easy...[???]

_Plan B: __**Success!**_

-

Christmas Day had come and gone, the group of six splitting early on in preparation for the coming night event.

Harry smoothed down his dress robes softly as he gazed at himself through the mirror. Fate had whisked the dark-green dress robes into his trunk a week earlier during the night, complete with instructions. They were modest-looking, nothing too flashy, and truth be told, Harry was just grateful they weren't covered in frills of any sort. It **did** however have a large, frumpy green bow instead of the basic bow-tie but he decided to let it go, knowing the smallest slight could set Fate off. His black hair, slightly longer than usual, was tied back in a small pony-tail by a single green ribbon. To Harry's disgruntlement, he looked more feminine than usual but at least he didn't need to wear a skirt. (Truthfully, the author hadn't thought of that until much later and was too lazy to change it though if enough people want it, she'd be happy to rewrite this scene with cross-dressing!Harry...)

"Looking good, Skywalker!" One of his room-mates complimented.

"Er... Thanks," Harry smiled, "You too." He glanced at the clock, _Good, still plenty of time... _With a purpose in mind, he left the room and headed up the stairs towards the sixth years dorm.

No sooner had he reached that platform, a head popped out from inside and beckoned him forward, Harry recognising him as one of Cedric's year-mates. "Thank Circe, you're here! Maybe you can talk some sense into that guy..." The teen laughed, shaking his head in fond exasperation before turning his head to speak to the people inside, "Hey, guys! Skywalker's here!"

Harry's mouth quirked slightly in wry amusement at the small cheer that seemed to result from the announcement. Three other males joined the one at the door and left down the stairs, each with a pat on his shoulder and a loud "Good luck!"

Harry peeked inside and, not to his surprise, the room looked like a tornado had gone through it, clothes strewn everywhere and a half-dressed, twitching Cedric Diggory right in the middle. He sighed as he loosened his tie slightly, stomping into the room with the intent of setting the blonde straight.

Half an hour later, one Cedric Diggory was looking the floor, properly chastised of his previous behaviour. The room now had every semblance of cleanliness and the blonde had been properly dressed in his well fit dress robes of a very dark and golden shade of yellow.

"Sit," Harry ordered and Cedric was quick to comply, somehow only just learning of his resemblance to his so-called arch-nemesis, Madam Pomphrey. The smaller boy wrapped a slim piece of fabric around his friend's neck before tying it into a simple bow. He took a step back to admire his handy work, giving the blonde a single nod in approval.

Cedric stood up and looked into the mirror, "Are you sure I look okay...?" he said, fiddling with his shirt.

Harry frowned, "Are you questioning me?"

"No, no... that's not what I meant," Cedric squeaked.

Harry nodded again, "Good. And stop messing with your shirt."

Cedric immediately dropped his hand.

The pair eventually made their way to the Great Hall. As they had left a little later than planned, the halls were mostly empty though when they reached the Great Hall, only Neville, Orion, Fleur, Roger Davies and Professor McGonagall were there.

"Ah, there you two are. Just in time," though the slightly stern look on her face told them exactly how close they had cut it.

They quickly mumbled apologies before moving to stand beside their partners. Harry smiled at Neville who smiled brightly in return.

"Y-you look great," he said, blushing lightly as he offered the younger boy his arm uncertainly.

Harry happily took it, "Thanks!" Harry eyed the brunette with a grin, giving his arm a light squeeze, "Though not nearly as nice as you." And he meant it. The brunette looked remarkably handsome in an expensive-looking, form-fitting set of dark blue dress robes.

Neville's face reddened like a tomato, completely lost for words.

Behind them, Cedric smiled nervously at Orion. The Gryffindor had chosen dark grey dress robe for the evening. Tentatively, he smiled back. Emboldened by the smile, he slung an arm around Orion's shoulders, his grin widening. Orion rolled his eyes and looked away but didn't make any move to shirk the other's arm off.

"Now, we're just waiting on Mr. Krum..."

As soon as Professor McGonagall had said this, the Bulgarian seeker arrived, a beautiful young lady in periwinkle blue robes. In fact, she looked quite familiar...

"Sorry we're late Professor."

"Hermione?!" Neville's jaw dropped as he recognised that voice, Cedric's jaw dropping too at the admission. Even Orion looked quite shock. Harry, on the other hand, hid a smile behind his hand, having already known in advance that was his no-longer-bushy-haired friend.

"Hey, guys!" Hermione greeted merrily, ignoring the flabbergasted looks entirely, "Oh, Harry! You look so adorable!" she said, playing with the large, frumpy, green bow.

"Thanks," Harry overlooked that stab at his masculinity and instead smiled, "And you look gorgeous, Hermione!"

Hermione beamed at him.

Harry glanced to his side and coughed. No response. He then nudged Neville with his elbow. The brunette jumped as he snapped out of his stupor, "Er... Yeah, you look great, Mione."

Hermione rolled her eyes but smiled appreciatively anyway. "Harry, Neville, this is Viktor Krum," she introduced as if they didn't already know, "Viktor, these are my friends Harry Skywalker, Neville Longbottom, Cedric Diggory and Orion Black."

"It's nice to meet you, Viktor," Harry greeted happily for Hermione's sake.

Krum nodded back politely in response. Harry smiled, not offended by the silence at all. The Bulgarian seemed a little surprised at that.

They didn't get a chance to say anything else as everyone had finally settled in the Hall, Professor McGonagall directing the Champions and their partners to get in line in pairs and follow her. They did so, and everyone in the Great Hall applauded as they entered and started. There were gasps in surprise when Neville entered with Harry and Cedric with Orion, many of the girls getting upset over the fact that two of the more popular males were unavailable, a couple even seeming close to tears. That surprise was nothing compared to when Hermione and Krum entered the Hall however. Krum's self-proclaimed fanclub, in particular, throwing her looks of deepest loathing.

The walls of the Hall had all been covered in sparkling silver frost with hundreds of garlands of mistletoe and ivy crossing the starry black ceiling. And this time, unlike the first, Harry could appreciate all of this without having to focus all of his attention on not tripping over his feet. A hand curled lightly around his waist and Harry could feel himself being gently guided across the dance hall.

[Sorry this was cut so short; it was such a bore to write... Might change it later if I feel up to it or think of something interesting to add. I'm also open to suggestions if you guys can think of something interesting/funny to add to J.K.'s rendition!]

-

There was a Hogsmeade visit halfway through January. However, as Harry couldn't go, the others (minus Ron) had contemplated staying behind as they didn't want to leave him all alone. It wasn't like that hadn't been there before, right? Harry, of course, insisted they didn't need to do such a thing (Ron agreed and promptly got smacked). After a brief argument, Ron finally suggested that Harry use the secret passage to Hogsmeade, the location of which he begrudgingly divulged to the three who didn't know about it (well, Harry did but he obviously pretended not to). Hermione, predictably, frowned at this, having never been one for rule-breaking, Cedric equally uncertain being a prefect himself (and decided it was probably best that he pretended that he hadn't heard a single word Ron had said). It was then, however, that Malfoy piped up, having heard their argument, offering to keep Harry company while the rest were away.

Of course, that closed the argument completely and on that weekend halfway through January, Harry found himself in Hogsmeade with his friends.

His friends of which included the usual number (Orion, Cedric, Neville, Hermione, Ron) plus a new addition (Viktor Krum) and...

"Malfoy," Ron growled, "Why the hell do you keep following us?!"

The blonde sniffed at him disdainfully, "I don't believe it's against to law to spend time with ones **friend**," he said, leering opening at Harry at that word, "Besides... I wouldn't have had to if Longbottom hadn't hogged Harry all to himself at the Ball."

Harry felt his brain break, _Since when have we been friends?! He's delusional!_

Meanwhile, Draco made a swipe for Harry but unfortunately, Neville deftly moved him out of the way before he could get his claws into him, hugging the small Hufflepuff close as he glared hatefully at the blonde.

...and then immediately released him seeing the look on Orion's face. A small fight broke out when Hermione moved to defend him, leaving poor Cedric to attempt to split them apart. Suffice to say, he didn't get out of that completely unharmed.

And poor Viktor Krum, the sane one, wondered why he felt more at home with these maniacs than with his Bulgarian friends.

"Ah~! And there's my wonderful Godson!" a voice suddenly called out.

"Wha-?" was the only sound Neville could make before a tall blonde-haired body collided into him and squeezed him in a hug.

_Neville's Godfather...?_ Harry squinted at the blonde-haired man. It obviously wasn't Sirius... and yet the blonde-haired man looked quite familiar. Harry's eyes widen, _**Wait, isn't that...?!**_

He didn't get a chance to finish that thought when a large crowd gathered around them, effectively cutting them off from the outside world.

"Oh~ Can I have your autograph? I'm your biggest fan, Mr. Lockhart~!" a middle-aged woman giggled, fluttering her eyelashes in a way she obviously thought was flattering.

And once again, Harry's brain exploded from this new information, _Neville's Godfather is that __**fraud?!**_

"What are you doing here?" Neville grumbled even as he smiled, posing for a picture picture with his Godfather.

"I came to visit my favourite Godson, of course! Surprise~!" Gilderoy Lockhart chirped happily as he waved to his fans, completely oblivious to stiff Neville was standing beside him, "And~ I heard you got yourself a cute boyfriend! I had to come see for myself! Oh, my little boy is growing up... they grow up so fast, don't they?" he practically shouted into the crowd, wiping away an imaginary tear from his baby blue eyes. A chorus of wistful agreements answered him.

Neville's smile turned apoplectic.

Harry could completely sympathise.

"Professor Lockhart was Neville's mum's best friend back in school," Hermione explained seeing the quizzical look on Harry's face.

"Professor...?" Harry echoed, _Hell... why is Hermione looking a little __**star-struck**__?!_

The bushy-haired brunette misinterpreted his question entirely, "Oh, yes, he taught Defense back in our second year."

_Second year... _Harry thought. Lockhart obviously hadn't been ousted as a fraud and now he thought about... he had a sudden horrifying thought, _Where the hell was __**Ginny**__?!_

He hadn't given it any thought considering they were in different Houses now, and it wasn't like they had gotten any closer after the war as she had hoped. But he was friends with Neville, Hermione and, by extension, Ron now... and hadn't Ginny gone with Neville to the Ball the first time round?

_And_, Harry felt a chill run down his spine, _hadn't Fate mentioned some time ago that Voldemort had come back that same year...?_

**What the hell had happened?!**

He didn't get a chance to comment when he was suddenly pulled into a crushing hug. "And this must be him! And aren't you a cute thing~? My Godson has obviously inherited my good taste!"

"It's nice to meet you too, Mr. Lockhart," Harry wheezed, being suffocated by Lockhart's expensive robes. For a fraud, he had an amazingly strong grip...

"Oh, no, none of that! You're family now~ You should call me Uncle Roy."

_What?! God, no!_ Harry thought, mortified.

"Uncle Roy," Neville groaned, "Please let Harry go... and he's not my boyfriend..." _Unfortunately_, a part of him sadly and Neville quietly agreed. They'd only gone to the Ball together because Harry wanted to see what it was like and couldn't go without an older student to take him, that's all... -cries on the inside-

"Why not?" three voices said at the same time.

Neville gaped at Harry, who was one of those voices along with Gilderoy Lockhart and Hermione.

The bushy-haired brunette also looked at Harry in shock but it didn't remain like that for long, "Yes, Neville, why isn't Harry your boyfriend?" she smirked at her best friend while Harry's emerald eyes just stared back at him imploringly in that sad, puppy-dog fashion.

Neville opened his mouth, seemed to change his mind and immediately shut it. Instead, he simply pointed at Orion's face.

"My, that's quite the scary look you go there, Orion," Cedric laughed, hand pulling at the fourth year's face, wholly unaffected by the Death Glare currently directed at him. His other arm wound around Orion's waist, effortlessly locking him in place despite the black-haired male's protests and energetic flailing. He **was** a very fit Quidditch player, after all.

"Well, I'm totally against," Ron Weasley huffed, crossing his arms in front of him.

Of course, Hermione was quick to step in.

"...is what I would have said before, but now I completely support you, Neville," Ron hastily corrected.

Hermione nodded with smug satisfaction. From beside them, Viktor Krum eyed her with growing admiration.

"Well, then, isn't there something you need to say?" Lockhart told Neville with a exaggerated wink and not-so-subtly nudged him towards Harry.

Neville flushed red, "Harry..." _DO IT!_ His inner!Neville screamed, pumping his tiny fist in the air, _TAKE WHAT BELONGS TO YOU!_ Neville hastily squashed him back down. He took Harry's tiny hand in his own, "Will you be my b-boyfriend?" he finally said, choking in embarrassment on the last word.

Harry smiled, "Yes."

The crowd burst out in congratulations, cheering, hooting and clapping for the new couple. Neville blushed even more; he'd completely forgotten they had an audience...

"Hey!" Draco Malfoy shouted from somewhere outside the ring of people, his normally immaculate blonde hair in a disarray, "What about my opinion?!" No one heard him over the raucous and before he could charge in, a hand reached out and pulled him back.

Draco tried to draw his wand on the person who dared to stop him but being back into the box he had been in severely hampered his attempt. Fate, completely invisible to the human eye, plopped himself down back on the lid, ignoring the indignant shouts coming from the box beneath him.

"They **do** grow up so fast, don't they?" Fate sobbed in an overly exaggerated fashion, blowing his nose loudly on his handkerchief before handing it to the man beside him, "Thanks for letting me borrow that, Dee-chan."

"...Don't call me, Dee-chan," Death automatically replied in that emotionless tone of his as he reluctantly took the soggy handkerchief with the tips of his fingers.

"Kiss! Kiss!" someone in the crowd started chanting loudly, quickly echoed by the people surrounding her and suddenly the whole crowd was shouting it.

Neville stared at them horrified. It wasn't that he didn't want to... no, to his embarrassment, quite the opposite. **But in front of all these people?!**

The brunette jumped when a body sidled up to him and wrapped itself around his arm. Neville glanced down, "Harry?" he queried weakly.

But to his surprise, Harry addressed their audience, "I'm sorry, but I want our first kiss to be somewhere special. I hope you guys don't mind?" he said, smiling at them cutely.

"No, of course not!" immediately came the chorus of replies, the crowd easily taken in by Harry's angelic face.

"Well, then, we're just going to go spend some time to get to know each, okay? So if you could just let us through..." the crowd immediately parted at Harry's command, much to Neville's amazement; usually when the people got like this, they were **never** leave him alone. "And no, we're not going to give you an interview, Miss Skeeter," Harry continued, directing his gaze at the woman slinking her way to the front of the crowd.

"But the public-" Rita Skeeter began, quill already poised in her hand and her personal photographer behind her, camera raised.

"No," Harry repeated forcefully, smile gaining a dangerous edge, "I know you believe you're entitled to every detail because Neville is a celebrity but our relationship is still new. The public will just have to wait until we're ready," _which will be never_, Harry thought wryly, "Please leave us alone." _Forever, if possible. But I know that's impossible with you people so I'll settle for a week_, he groaned inwardly.

"Yeah, leave them alone!" one of the crowd fervently defended and suddenly, there was a chorus of agreement and entirety of Harry's new fan-club converged on the unsuspecting news reporter.

Neville gaped at Harry for a moment but quickly shook himself out of it with a smile. Should he really be surprised that Harry wouldn't try to sell their love-story to the media like many others would? No, not at all.

_Oh, so it's __**love**__ now, is it?_ inner!Neville cackled. Once again, Neville hurriedly shoved it back.

But a portion of that feeling leaked out and unconsciously, Neville leant forward and pressed a chaste kiss to the side of Harry's mouth, "Thanks..."

Harry's eyes widened in surprise, his cheeks tingeing a soft pink.

_OMG, he's so~ adorable!_ inner!Neville squealed. Neville ignored him with all his might.

Another round of raucous cheering rose from their audience, somehow louder than the last.

To their left, Hermione's eyes welled up with tears as she clung onto Viktor Krum in her overwhelming joy. Consequently, Viktor looked awfully happy with the situation himself. Ron's face, on the other hand, scrunched up in disgust but said nothing lest he find himself at the receiving end of Hermione's wrath once more.

"**I'm going to fucking kill him**," fumed Orion to their right. But luckily for Neville, he was easily held back by a grinning Cedric Diggory and his sexy, Quidditch muscles ;)

But this being Neville Longbottom (Harry Potter's equivalent in this world), all good things would inevitably come accompanied by something very, very bad. The screams of delight quickly turned into screams of fear as a shadow shot up into the darkened sky. A skull with a snake protruding from it's mouth hovered there as it stared down at them, the dark omen one of man.

_**Voldemort.**_

* * *

Read. Review. ...and please don't kill me? :D

P.S. I completely forgot about Barry o_O oops? I might rewrite the Ball scene to add him... and another Malfoy appearance but it'd still be kind of dull... give me some good ideas and I might reconsider :)

Status: U.L.H. (Unbetaed Like Hell... btw, I think I need to think of better curses... used that one way too much...)


	8. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I only wish I could say the same. Please don't sue me. Thank you. In particular, anything you recognise is most possibly an extract from the fourth book, _Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire_.

**Thank you so much to my reviewers :D and many apologies also! To be honest, I'd written the first half of this right after I posted the last chapter and then my brain had sorta died (as you can probably tell...). And then I lost my copy of HP and the Goblet of Fire... I know, "excuses, excuses" but seriously, I have no idea where I'm going with this story so I'll be just as surprised as you are when you read it haha...**

**Another small tip of the hat to the wonderful, **_**Firefly**_

**By the way, plot is so boring... T_T**

**Been ages since I've last written and my writing is prone to deterioration... I feel less funny also :(**

**U.B.L.H.**

**I **_**will**_** get this done though... once I've located my copy of the fourth book ^^;;**

Warnings: Slight slash, unbetadness, screwed up personalities, characters with PMS and MPD (possibly at the same time), tooth-decaying clichés, OOC characters out of character of their OOCness but still not in character (I'm not particularly good at being consistent...), plotholes galore, anime-esqueness (because I seriously watch too much of it...) and blatant self-insertion

* * *

**Fate's Favourite Toy.**

Chapter 7.

_The screams of delight quickly turned into screams of fear as a shadow shot up into the darkened sky. A skull with a snake protruding from it's mouth hovered there as it stared down at them, the dark omen of one man._

_**Voldemort.**_

Harry scowled as he carefully peeked out of the dark alley, methodically taking in the situation. Somehow, during the confusion and mass hysteria, he had gotten separated from his friends. And to add to his annoyance, of all the people to get saddled with, it was-

"Oh~! Please have mercy~!" Lockhart sobbed from the little corner he had curled up in, "I'm too beautiful to die!"

-this guy!

He supposed it could have been worse; at least it wasn't Malfoy...

(Retse paused in her typing as she stared at the screen in contemplation, "Hmm..."

Harry glared at her, "No."

"But-!"

"No!"

"...Fine," she finally conceded with a pout on her face, "Spoilsport...")

Harry sighed, small disaster averted, turned his gaze back to the greater disaster occurring outside. As much as he hated having to draw attention to himself, he had to do something; and **fast**. If he didn't do anything soon, this would become another one of those angsty!Harry stories!

"And we certainly cannot have that, oh no~!"

Harry blinked and glanced over his shoulder. His eyes narrowed immediately, "**YOU!**" he growled viciously, pointing an accusing finger at the one who had spoken.

"Yes, me," Fate chirped happily, completely unaffected at being the target of Harry's anger.

"What are you doing here?"

"Making sure that you do something, of course!" Fate said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "Really Harry, have misjudged you? Will you seriously stand back while your friends are killed?"

"No, of course not but-"

"Then go forth and save your people!" Fate shouted, thrusting his arm out towards the closest screaming victim of a Death Eater.

"Someone help me!" Rita Skeeter screamed in agony.

Harry stared at her, "...Do I have to?"

Fate froze and stared at her too.

Rita Skeeter screamed some more.

"...Okay, maybe not that one," Fate eventually agreed, turning his back on the flailing woman, "But everyone else you must save!" he said, gesturing emphatically again.

Behind them, Death stared at them stonily. The future of this world depended on **these two**...? Suddenly, he had an overwhelming feeling that his job was going to be a lot more swamped than usual...

"Well then, what you waiting for?" Fate huffed.

Harry gave him a dry look, "Fine, I'll help but I'm not going out there looking like **this**," he hissed, gesturing at his petite, eleven-year old figure. "That would be like dancing naked in front of Dumbledore with a sign saying 'I'm young, stupid and strangely powerful! Sacrifice me for the Greater Good!'"

"That can be easily fixed," Fate replied, drawing out a thin glass tube from his pocket and waved it around in Harry's face.

Emerald eyes narrowed, "...Polyjuice? What would I do with-" Pause. "Oh, **hell NO!**"

"Oh, hell yes," Fate smirked.

* * *

Neville's grip on his wand tightened as he glared at the man before him, ruby red eyes glinting at him even beneath the darkened sky. Beside him, his friends and colleagues, equally tensed as they eyed the masked men standing along side the Dark Lord. Anyone with eyes could see they were ill-matched and the future seemed grim but they wouldn't stand down. They, like Neville, will fight!

With Dumbledore yet to arrive, the scene was eerily silent as they stared each other down, broken only by the occasional scream of fear in the distance. Who will make the first move? Who will throw themselves down as the first casualty of war? Who will-

"So you finally decided to show yourself, Tom."

Neville's eyes bulged almost comically as he instantly recognised that voice. What was that fraud **doing**? He should have made his getaway at the first sign of danger, only reappear when it was all over and _obliviate_ his way through to whatever credit he could possibly get away with...

While the rest of the world seemed to have remained blissfully unaware, Neville alone knew the truth. Gilderoy Lockhart was a **fraud**, a far-cry from the gallant hero depicted in his books. But as the blonde man was his Godfather, and as such for the sake of his dearly departed mother, he never spoke a word of it.

A horrible, horrible feeling started to well up in him. Had the man bleached his hair so much that he himself was beginning to believe the drivel he'd written?

"**Who are you that would dare use that name!**" Voldemort hissed angrily, all presence of his earlier smirk gone.

"No one of consequence," the blonde replied coolly. (Neville blinked rapidly before rubbing his eyes roughly; was he seeing things? He hadn't seen such a serious look on his godfather's face since that time the man discovered he'd grown his first grey hair!)

"It's Gilderoy Lockhart! We're saved!" One of his more adoring fans whispered loudly to her companion though, with the silence that came at the appearance of Voldemort, it had the same effect of her shouting it in everyone's faces.

More whispers broke out instantly and, to Neville's chagrin, the people around him actually started to **relax**, even Ron and Hermione! Maybe it was time he seriously considered getting new best friends...

The smirk on Voldemort's face returned, "Lockhart, is it?"

The blonde grimaced but said nothing. (_And what is going on with that? _Neville thought, thoroughly confused; if he didn't know better he could've sworn that it actually looked like the man **disliked** being recognised so easily!)

"Very well. Then I thank you for volunteering to be the first," Voldemort said mockingly before whipping out his wand, "To die! _Avada Kedavra!_"

Screams rang out as the deadly green light hurtled towards Lockhart. For a moment, nothing happened, the man seemingly just as surprised at the turn of events as his audience. Then the next moment, the spell harmlessly crashed into the brick wall behind him. Lockhart had jumped up, executed a perfect triple somersault in the air over the path of the spell and landed gracefully on his feet.

Neville's jaw dropped.

Having simultaneously stunned his entire audience, the five times winner of _Witch Weekly's _Most-Charming-Smile Award then proceeded to effortlessly cartwheel across the gap separating the two groups and finished it off by solidly kicking Voldemort in the face.

Screams rang out again, though this time they were screams of excitement as Lockhart's fans cheered their hero on.

Neville, however, wondered idly if this was what going insane felt like.

Then Lockhart wiggled his wand in a weird fashion which Neville recognised as his godfather's usual blundering of perfectly simple spells. So it wasn't hard to believe that the brunette's eyes almost popped out of his head when a sudden shock-wave escaped the wand, knocking half of the Death Eaters to the ground and very much unconscious.

_No, __**this**__ must be what going insane must feel like_, Neville silently corrected.

The rest Death Eaters didn't stick around much longer, quickly disbanding after seeing so many of their comrades so easily defeated, even Voldemort felt a little out of sorts (as one would no doubt feel after getting kicked in the face by a man who covers his books with a winking portrait of himself) as he called for them to retreat at this unexpected new character.

Cheers rang out again in Hogsmeade at their victory, the people amazed that no one had gotten seriously hurt (well, except for maybe Rita Skeeter but no one really cares about her, right?).

"Hey, where did Lockhart go?" one befuddled man suddenly asked.

The crowd quietened as they too searched for their hero who had miraculously disappeared during their brief raucous celebrations.

"Yeah! I was going to ask for his autograph!"

"Oh, no! You don't think You-Know-Who took him prisoner, do you?"

"Don't be stupid! A man of his calibre would never allow You-Know-Who to get the better of him."

"Look! There he is!" one excited woman shouted, pointing to the blonde man as he stumbled out of an alley, looking a little lost. None of them seemed to notice that however as they crowded around him, cheering once more.

"You're my hero, Mr. Lockhart!"

"Yeah! You certainly showed them, didn't you?"

"What?" Lockhart looked a little confused but he seemed to snap out of whatever daze he was in a moment later, "Oh, yes! Of course! Hahaha," he laughed before flashing his award-winning smile, "All in a day's work."

As a nearby bunch of females seemed to swoon at that, Neville just stared at his godfather nonplussed; What in the world had just happened?

Meanwhile, in the very alley Lockhart had stumbled out of, his exact look-like plopped himself down on a wooden crate, out of sight of any prying eyes, and sighed. He then turned and glared at the small boy beside him, "I hate you."

Fate just giggled.

_All in a day's work, indeed_.

* * *

It'd been only a week since the appearance of Voldemort and, to Neville's annoyance, already people seemed to be forgetting about him. What with the apparent appearance of Gilderoy Lockhart and Voldemort's subsequent 'defeat', people were more than happy to believe that the threat wasn't much of a threat at all with their hero in the picture.

And Neville didn't know what he thought about that particular bit of information...

(though he was expecting a pig to fly past his window any day now)

What's worse, seeing the public's lack of interest of the dark and gloom, Rita Skeeter was all to happy to focus her articles on exposing Hagrid's 'giant' secret. The now-outed half-giant had taken to moping in his hut, not caring that a substitute had to be found to take care of his class.

There wasn't anyone Neville hated more than Voldemort but Rita Skeeter was rapidly climbing to a close second.

A small hand reached out to grasp his before squeezing it lightly, "Hey, what's wrong?" Harry asked.

Neville's dark mood disappeared immediately at the first-year's appearance, "Hagrid still won't come out of his hut," he said, his bright smile in complete contradiction to his sullen statement. He couldn't find it in himself to be sad as he happily returned the light squeeze.

The first-year seemed to realise that as his mouth quirked slightly in amusement, "Then we should go down to Hagrid's hut and tell him how much we want him to come back."

"**Exactly**!" Hermione suddenly burst out of no-where, "He should **never** have let that poor excuse for a human being upset him! Come on!" she urged, rushing to the door. But when she reached it, she realised no one had followed her. Glancing back, she rolled her eyes seeing both boys still stunned and wide-eyed from her sudden appearance.

"**Come on!**" she repeated, picking up Harry in her arms and ran out the door with him over her shoulder.

"Wah? Hey! Give him back!" Neville protested, quickly followed her.

"Why do people keep doing this?" Harry complained indignantly.

"Because it's effective," Hermione smirked and as if to prove her point, Cedric immediately fell into step beside her.

"Hey guys!" he smiled, "Where are we going? Oh, hey Orion!" Cedric greeted happily as they ran past the dark-haired Gryffindor.

Orion gaped at them for a moment before shaking himself and charged after them, "Granger! Put him down right now! You're going to drop him!"

"Not until we convince Hagrid to come back to teach us!" Hermione shouted without looking back.

"Please," Draco sneered as he jogged up beside her, "Not even the other Gryffindorks want him back, let alone the rest of the school. You may as well give it up Granger, the rest of us like having a competent professor for Care of Magical Creatures for once."

"Shut up, Malfoy!" Ron shouted as he ran up to them, "I bet it was your fault Hagrid's like this in the first place!"

Draco rolled his eyes.

"I vill also accompany you, Hermo-ninny," Viktor Krum offered instead as he joined the group.

Hermione blushed lightly and smiled at him, "Thank you, Viktor."

Ron glared at the pair, face reddening. He managed to keep his mouth shut however by instead turning to hiss at Malfoy again, "What the bloody hell are you doing anyway? Piss off already!"

"Why else would I be following you idiots?" the blonde smirked at him then leered at the small boy hanging over Hermione's shoulder. Half-lidded grey eyes smouldered as he stared at him with a sinister smile on his face, "Run, little one, run as far as you can. The more you run, the more I burn for you..."

"Faster, Hermione, faster!" Harry urged, clearly horrified.

"Oh, hey! It's Harry!" Colin Creevey shouted happily, his camera suddenly appearing in his hands out of seemingly nowhere.

"Hey Harry! Where are you going?" Dennis Creevey echoed as they joined them.

"Hermione..."

"Yes, I know, I know. 'Faster!'"

By the time they had reached Hagrid's hut, they'd pulled along a rather large group of friends and fans behind them, most of which included the newly formed and rather vocal NevHar slash fanclub (who, might I add, were glaring fiercely at the small but vehement group of Drarry supporters who had also decided to tag along behind them).

"Right!" Hermione exclaimed as she put her hands on her hips completely forgetting that she had Harry over her shoulder. Without a hand to keep him in place, Harry slid off of her rather slim shoulder with a soft, "Eep."

But before he found himself face first onto the ground, arms reached out and pulled him into a warm embrace. Looking up, emerald eyes caught the worried gaze of Neville Longbottom, "Are you alright?" he murmured.

And then their fanclub burst into loud squeals of happiness.

Harry glanced at them and then looked back at Neville, eye twitching, "I... There are mixed feelings..."

Neville could only smile back helplessly.

"Right!" Hermione repeated, pumping her fist in the air. "Everyone know what to do?" she asked, having apparently organised something in the short time they had looked away. Everyone nodded, "Then-"

"What's in it for us?" Draco drawled, crossing his arms in front of him. The crowd around him murmured in agreement. They didn't really care whether the half-giant came back to teach or not... many of them didn't even take that class!

Hermione glared at the blonde but then an idea hit her, a smirk gracing her face when she turned to address her audience, "If you help me do this then... Neville will kiss Harken."

Draco and Orion's twin shouts of "Over my dead body, he will!" was easily drowned out from the cacophony from the fans.

"Hermione!" Harry hissed, blushing madly as did Neville though he made no move to remove his arms from around the smaller boy.

"Do this," she gave them a doleful look, "for **Hagrid**."

Both boys instantly deflated, remembering exactly who had given them Hedwig for their eleventh birthday.

Smiling triumphantly, she turned her attention back to the crowd and-

Everything went black.

"What?" Fate shouted in surprise. Hopping up from his comfy spot on the couch, he hurriedly rushed to his crystal TBV (TeleBallVision) and started banging on it. It remained completely black.

"Noo~! Not now! And it was just getting to the good part too..." he sobbed. "Dee-chan!"

"What?" Death grumbled as he poked his head in through the door.

Fate just pointed at his TBV despondently as his eyes watered and his bottom lip wobbled.

Death sighed, "Well, that's what happens when you don't look at after your author," he said, gesturing at the aforementioned person who was currently slumped over in a dead faint over her computer.

"Oh," Fate blinked, "Oops."

Death sighed again, "Remember, you need to feed her three times a day, play with her and take her out for walks, and..."

Days later, Harken finally appeared again, this time in a corridor of Hogwarts for no apparent reason. He seemed to be in a spot of trouble, though why this was was uncertain at the moment as the author had been brain-dead for the past couple of days or so.

"Shit!" Harry cursed as he glanced around the corner, "Now what do I do?"

(At the same time, the author wondered the exact same thing. She was running out of ideas.)

"Something," someone said behind him.

"Wah? Ginny!" Harry jumped, more than a little surprised at her sudden appearance.

The girl's head turned to look at him. She had a bored look on her face, eyes half-lidded as if she'd drop into slumber at any given moment, "Ah?" she replied, head tilted slightly as she nonchalantly stuck her pinky in her right ear and wiggled it for a bit.

"I'm... er, glad to see... you..." he said awkwardly, clearly uncertain as to what to say. Well, what could he say? Glad you weren't dead like I thought you were? Sorry for the misunderstanding?

Ginny looked away in disinterest, "Wasn't so much as a misunderstanding," she said as if she had read his mind, attention drifting as she studied the bit of earwax on the tip of her finger intently, "More like the author completely forgot about me until she wrote that bit in the last chapter."

"Oh," Harry intoned.

"Yes, though I'm not that surprised," the red-head continued as if Harry had said something deeply meaningful that signalled the need for the rest of the story to be revealed, "She doesn't really like me considering in most of the fanfiction she reads, I'm a soul-sucking harpy who only wants to use you for your money and fame and to make a multitude of red-haired, green-eyed babies with."

"Oh," Harry repeated lowly.

Awkward silence.

Harry coughed, "Er, well, it was good seeing you Ginny..."

The red-head ignored him.

He quickly took this chance to edge away. And immediately ran into someone else. Harry grunted, rubbing his injured nose, "Sorry Professor Dumbledore..." _Why can't I ever seem to be able to make a clean getaway?_

The Headmaster smiled down at him with that infernal twinkle in his eye, "That's quite alright, Mister Skywalker. You know, you're quite a difficult young man to find. Follow me, we've been searching for you quite some time now and we don't have a moment to lose..." he said before he twirled around and strode off in he direction he had come.

"...Huh?" was Harry's only answer as he watched him leave. Snapping out of his surprise a moment later, he hurriedly caught up with the aged professor, cursing his short, skinny legs for what seemed like the millionth time he'd arrived in this world. For an old man, Dumbledore certainly moved fast...

"What is this about, Professor?" Harry queried when his curiosity finally getting the better of him after trekking down many corridors and staircases in silence.

"All will be explained in a moment," Dumbledore replied, that twinkle in his eye growing by the second and as did Harry's wariness. "In here, my boy," he said as they reached a sturdy wooden door, ushering in the small boy into the room behind it like a favourite Grandfather.

_A psychotic, killer grandfather, that is_, was the thought that crossed Harry's mind, gasping loudly as he took in the prone figures of Hermione and Orion sprawled out on a dusty, maroon rug. Spinning around immediately, his fears were confirmed when he saw the visage of the Headmaster towering over him, wand pointed directly at his face.

"_Stupefy_!"

Despite being in a much smaller body, years of training kicked in right at the moment as Harry twisted out of spell's reach by barely a hair's width, the red beam heating his cheek as it whizzed past him. Whipping out his wand and a flick of his wrist later, he easily incapacitated the old wizard in the same way the older man intended to incapacitate him. There was a brief look of surprise on Dumbledore's face before he succumbed to the spell, falling back onto the ground with a loud thump.

Not a moment later, no doubt drawn by that last sound, the door burst open and in came Professors Minerva McGonagall and Filius Flitwick. They stared at him.

"Mister Skywalker, what-" McGonagall begun but Flitwick quickly interrupted her, "...Is that Albus on the floor?"

Both paused a moment to stare at the prone figure that was their boss, laying on the ground. McGonagall tried again, "Mister Skywalker..." she paused, clearly uncertain where to begin, "What happened here."

Harry instantly jumped up from his defensive crouch position, "Professor Dumbledore! He's gone insane! Or, well... maybe that should be more insane but **insane**! Or he's been possessed!" from there he gestured wildly at the unconscious figures of his friends, shouting about how the Headmaster said he'd been looking for him, had then led him here and then had attacked him, and he'd only stunned him in self-defence and, and...

Flitwick started to giggle.

Harry fell silent. What was so funny? Nothing about this situation was funny...

"A first-year got the jump on Albus," Flitwick practically squeaked with barely veiled amusement.

McGonagall gave her co-worker a stern look though a twitch of her mouth showed how she really felt, before she turned her attention to Harry and sighed. "As Albus probably should have explained before his enthusiasm at wanting the scenario to be a 'real' as possible got to him, a person important to each champion is required for the Second Task. That is why he brought you here, Mister Skywalker."

"Oh," Harry blinked, "**Oooh**," he repeated when her words finally sunk in, memories of the Second Task rushing back to him. Well, that certainly explained everything, didn't it? (Well, except for the part that the Headmaster was a nut-job) He stared down at the Headmaster and flushed slightly in embarrassment, "Oops..."

Flitwick burst out in laughter.


End file.
